I am from a bahun family, and the girl I love is chhetri. My MOM & DAD are educated person(both are professors) and I thought they wouldnot belive in caste system. But when I told them a love that gal, they said it is impossible. I haven;t talked with them bu they think she is from lower caste. I don't want to hurt their feelings but what about mine?? And the gal's? I don't know what to do? Would you all dare to go against you parent's decision?? I need some good comments, it is really a serious matter and I think you all guys are very good to help me out...

How to make parents not but on me on my idea of getting married to more than one girl ?

I am sorry to diguise you about two other things my parents included- 1.Social and economic Status of the gal's family..her grandfathers didn't have good reputation(not living anymore) 2. And the gal is 2 yrs younger(17) than me (19) ... also she is just now in 9th grade....I also feel ashamed to say that.

They didn't directly pointed out that it is due to caste but it is explicit that they are doing this coz of caste, they point out caste in third mixing with upper two reasons...

And they are trying to bribe me with exaples of other gorgious gals they are thinking for me.......... They may be good looking than my gal but I don't love them,..... coz I feel really sorry(PITY) for my gal.

Hey rum now u talk SHIT. At first I felt sorry for you but now I dont believe if ur fabricating something .......

1. How can u talk abt marriage when ur only 19? (well of course u can but.... I dont think its right age)

2. u talk so long and ask people's advices regarding INTERCASTE but now ur saying that isn not the main casue , SHIT...........

(as per ur own words---------They didn't directly pointed out that it is due to caste but it is explicit that they are doing this coz of caste, they point out caste in third mixing with upper two reasons)

3. At the same time, there is nothing wrong to b in love when ur gal is 2 years younger than u. I think thats perfect but...........she is in 9th grade re...........!!! I cant understand and u say Ur parents r trying to show better looking gals than ur GF (if that is true) commmmmmmnnn if u say ur PARENTS r well educated, do they want u to get married in such a young age................!! How is it possible? if they dont want u to involve with her then thy can apply any other ideas but I dont think they hav shown other gals.............

---------whatever........is it..........I wont get married with any gal I dont like........or by force of parents......NEVER NEVER though they love me lot and they also know I cant be happy with her.............

so Love and Respect is not only fron one side it should be TWO WAY TRAFFIC.....if ur parenst know that u cant be happy with other gal how can they FORCE u.......is it a TRUE LOVE????

किन लभ गर्नु भन्दा पहिला बाउ आमा लैनसोधेकोत अर्कै जत्को केटी सँग लभगरु है भनेर,
,,,,,,,विधी ,,,,,,,,, लिएर अहिले बाउआमा लाई दोश दिने
तेही केटी सँग बिहे गर्नै पर्छ । । ।

Let me preface by saying that I'm a bahun myself, and I would never marry a non-bahun, not because that's what my parents want, but because it is my intention to marry a bajai. Nobody can force me to think otherwise. However, if I decide to marry somebody else, how would my parents be able to stop me? The answer is they can't and they won't. Certainly, there may be some short-term problems, but in the long-haul you will all get along. Why should I, or anybody else force you to think differently? Not my line of thinking. I am a libertarian on these issues. Personal decision. Personally, I wouldn't do it. I would give you a weird look for marrying a non-bahun, but then I would just shrug it off and realize that it's your personal decision. I have seen some of these couples a few times( and trust me I don't attend Nepali parties that much...at most 5 times and I've been here for almost a decade) and I admit that it made me feel a little queasy. Personal decision. But anyways, go ahead and live your life how you desire. You can marry a stripper if you want. Who gives a flying fudge? To hell with society.
Now what bothers me the most is the hypocrisy that some people exude regarding intercaste marriage. Some of these bahun suckers, who whine about how bad the caste system is will never marry a non-bahun. They will stick with somebody of their caste 100%. The point is try to be truthful. Isn't it a bit hypocritial if you feel that everybody should mix up, but you won't do it yourself? Of course these people will never admit how they feel. I have a hard time dealing with these suckers.

Okay, rum is a lying sack of sh1t.

Mr. Lonely - :P uffff!! :)
i don't think i can eat a lot of momo in the summer ke! :P (it's a joke ke, hope you got it!) (wink,wink) :P :P

rum - you are only 19 and you wanna get married???

that's not cool ke!!!

ufffff!!! i have a perfect solution for you, here's what i suggest you do:
don't marry her, but just wait and see how your mind changes ke, cause i gurantee you that it will, when you're like 25 and if you still want to marry then you probably really do need to marry her and only her but by then you'll probably have moved on(hopefully). So, right now don't do anything ke, she's your gf then just leave it to gf ni!!! that way you parents are happy for now and so are you!!! and also she's in 9th grade let me say that again 9th grade!!!!!!!!!!
the answer is NO and i mean NO!!! you would be ruining her life if you marry her now ke, do you want to do this?? of course NOT!!!
so wait for like 5 or 6 years, and see if you guy's are still together or not and then start worrying about this intercast marriage thing then ke, NOT now!! uffffffff!!!

Dude, live your life while you can ni, you are only 19! :)

Enjoy!!!! (wink,wink)

It is a marriage between you and the girl not between your parents. If you can protect each other from the social discrimination after the marriage and the rage the family shows after marriage then you will be successful in the end. Everything else can go to hell you two happy. GOD BLESS YOU AND GOOD LUCK I WILL PRAY FOR YOU.

Hey Nail,
You sound like my cousin **ni**. She use to include some "ni" and a lot of "ke" while speaking. R U really **ni** ???

Kiwi,
Context---
He is 19 ( a kid; may be not; how dare you judge a man... a kid .....no no ...a man...well.. whatever... by his age? ) . She is in ninth grade . Parents are against it.

Jump of the cliff.
Don't worry. ;-)
You will be fine.
I am praying for you. he he.
There's an angel waiting down there. ajhha, la.. jaata..

Just kidding. I respect those who do ( or say) what they believe.

Guys I am not lying, whotever I told is true... I just didn't tell you everything in detail at first.

rum there's no way i could be your cousin ke, my cousin's that are outside nepal are way too up there to even come to sajha and post stuff like this ke!!! so i am sure there's no way i am related to you!!! :) :)

so tell us what did you plan to do about this problem of yours??? :)

I am still avoiding calls from home. I haven't called my gal for two weeks- I though it would make her more impassionate about me if I call once a month instead of evey another day. As per u all's suggestion, I am waiting till I graduate and make my own career. Then I would again raise this question. For the moment I am telling at home that I don't love that gal anymore and I want to just concentrate on my studies rite now.............. Will this be a good decision??? Need more comments..

Rum you are toooooooo young to get married.......so forget about it now.....
If you reach the age of getting married then you can think of it...okay...

rum bro, get married as early as possible and join a sad company some might say. You never know what happens tomorrow. Take most out of today, don't wait for easier days, they will never come, dude.

OOPS I MISSED THE SECOND POST BY RUM GEE HE IS UNDERAGE. YOU GUYS SHOULD WAIT FOR EACH OTHER GIVE IT TIME.

underage thing is just for America, Rum go ahead dude, don't listen others, listen to your heart. do what ever it says to you.

I would leave my parents and stay with my love in your case. Possibleonly if you can support yourselves. If you are not able to support yourself, then forget about the girl and marry the girl of your parent choice and live with your parents money.

Hyaa everyone is saying go for it go for it. Do you even know what you guys are saying? It's not that easy people. If you love your parents and you're the only child, then this is one of the toughest decision that you will have to make. First of all. Always keep in mind that marriage is between two families and not just between a girl and a guy.
Okay first of all, the problem with Nepali parents are the double standards. They say they are cool at first and try to act all modern and stuff when it comes to other people. Tara when it comes to their own kids, they are totally different. They say hunna banera. Tara that doesn't mean that you will dare your parents. Try to convince them through logic and reasoning. Aba if you were bold enough to date a girl from another cast, you should be bold enough to convince your parents. If not then you don't deserve that girl at all. You've been playing with her life all along. And to be clear, bold means to talk to them freely, answering all their concerns and questions and trying to convince them, not to get married right away and showing them your wedding photos. And further are the girl's parents okay with that also? If not you may have family complications after marriage. Keep all these things in mind and try to come up with a solution. Try to understand your parents and how they will react after you get married. I agree with a lot of people here that usually parents will get over the bombshell with time. But do you really love her and know her inside and out and do you really want to take all the risk with her? Maybe you should just wait for sometime before your mind clears out and take some time to convince your parents. They will eventually listen. Don't rush into these things. It's pretty serious. Try to make everyone happy without sacrificing your own and the girl's happiness.

UNTOUCHABILITY
The sub Indian continent
• Resided by the Drabid and Astrik races.
• Originated form two of the ancient civilizations known as Sindhu Ghati and Mohenjadaro.
• In 3000 BC Aryans from Iran invaded the sub Indian continent.
• Their physical appearances were different from the Drabid and Astrik races.
• Aryans were fairer with brown hair, pointed nose and long shaped head while the later were dark in color.
• The Aryans started hating those with other color skin except for the fairer skins.
• At the initial stage the term race represented division of color i.e. apartheid on color of the skin.
Rig-Veda
• The Aryans were the founders of the Rig-Veda
• During 1500-1000BC.
• Byas initiated collecting the oral Richas of the Aryans and late edited them.
• The tenth mandal of the Rig-Veda represents the contemporary period of Byas where the division of caste is included for the first time.

The conflict between Aryans and Non-Aryans
• Based on slavery, apartheid and division of labor.
• Aryans Ruled Slavery System.
• The labor division;
o Brahman as the priests and earners of knowledge and education,
o Kshetriya as the security and administrative workers,
o Baishya as the animal traders, farmers and business traders and
o The Shudras as the hard labors, skilled labors and service oriented workers.

Untouchability and the Varna System
• No evidence of untouchability even after establishment of the Varna system for nearly 1000 years.
• The Shudras were not forbidden to read and cite the Shastras.
• The eligibility of the labor and with the permission of the ruler,
• The Varnas were transformable.
• Brahman King Manu (200 BC), founder of the untouchability under the Varna system.
• Shudras was made untouchables.
 The Shudras represented
o the prisoners of war,
o bankrupt
o slaves,
o children of slaves,
o people who were bought,
o people received as donation and
o Who had accepted slavery against the Kings punishment.