Sorry to hear that you are having difficult time. Like everyone else suggested, it is easy to tell you to live together with your wife. But it cannot happen in a snap. Looks like people like you and yor wife are making four times higher ($60 or more) at Desi's IT job compared to another $15 option. Once your income increases, it is very difficult to go back to previous income level. And impossible to survive when your income becomes four times lower (15 vs 60).

I am not IT person and make way too little. A QA I know makes $68, another system engineer makes $75 and several others around me make about the same or probably even more. Few of their spouses are in different cities, but they all look much happier with great expensive European cars, impressive vacations, lavish lifestyle with regular visits to casinos and upscale bars as well as excellent investment portfolios. Some even talk about millions. Most are living with their spouses, but those who are not also seem to be doing fine with frequent visits. Sorry, I cannot feel the intensity of your pain, but if you can handle it and your wife is also on the same page, it might just be a step towards your happy future.Best wishes!