@sidster ya u r right sometimes i can't control myself. People tell me it's you who was supposed to control what u do but they won't really understand that there is somebody inside me who triggers uncontrollable manners that is not accepted in society.
@arnill0l i know everyone has it
@freedom loneliness is among the ones, living far away from families. But there r many reasons. I was taking the medicines from Nepal. So it's on n off. When i take a medicine i get very down to earth. Scared to go n interact  with people. Sometimes i stayed at room watching tv all day n night. But when i don't take medicine i m very arrogant always arguing with others. So I am thinking i had got this disease from my inheritance. Sometimes i am high sometimes low, i think i have OCD n bipolar disorder. I haven't taken medicines since two years as frens n family suggests me not to take. They even try to throw away my prescriptions saying you dun need this, you better than this, common you can control your mind, you the one who is thinking that way, this and that. In reality they don't understand no matter how hard i tried to think positive, i get so negative. I have lost hope that someday i can be successful. Also i m lost in culture. Ever since I landed in US, i always think why i wasn't born here in a rich welleducated white family.