I agree with the agony the girl and her family has to go through. It's not easy...especially the girl being torn apart in living...parental home or her 'new home'. 

It is true that the guys have to be considerate for the consequences that girl/family have to suffer. They should not do that.

Now, let's go little deeper here. Why such relations are even established? In arrange marriages, why just because the guy lives in the west, no matter how enslaved condition, it appears that he is an immidiate match. How come? Are families still that dumb that they are taking a that risk just to see their daughters in an 'idea american' life style?

Therefore, my conviction is that the guy is at fault, but even before that the girl herself and mainly her family is at fault.