Posted by: Homeyji November 14, 2011
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Pinpoint,
You have requested me to continue with my story, so I do.
Bitter truth, thank you for sharing your profound words. You should write more, my friend. You have amazing realizations.
Dear friends,
Yesterday, I took a walk. I took a long long walk. I needed to. Inside myself, I felt over-crowded. The demands of work, family, friends had crowded in on me. I try to meet these demands in my life. It gives me great pleasure to do so. But I was realizing yesterday that there is little space in my room for more.
I was realizing that I need to live life at the pace that I fnd it beautiful. Live too slow and the world looks ugly. Live it too fast and the world get's ugly. I need to live it at the speed of poetry.
Poetry is the language of the soul. And in our modern day of living in the rat race, it is this inner-poetry that is so easy to lose touch with.
My family could use more of my service. My work could use more of my service. I could always find ways to earn more money. More and more and more. I get so involved in the world that I don't even realize that I have lost touch with my inner poetry.
Well, when I was living in the monastery, it was very easy to maintain this poetry and be in touch with inner-beauty. There were very few demands of the external world. I lived as a monk. I had a regulated schedule I woke up at 3:45 A.M everyday. I went for celebrations. Ceremonies. Think of them as spiritual parties. It was a spiritual theme party that took the time to appreciate the beauties of the universe. There was serenity.
There was space at the temple to explore and find your own inner beauty. Modern day living does not give me this kind of space. I have to fight very hard to get the kind of space I want, the kind of space I enjoyed as a teenager living at the monastery.
So at this monastery, because of the theme, the mood and the other monks, the mood was very concentrated. The mood was very thick. It was very focussed. And you didn't have to be embarrased about pursuing your search for beauty with zeal. Finding beauty in this world is not easy. There is so much in the world that is ugly. But the spiritual practices made finding beauty so much easier.
The biggest thing you first find is space. Space from the demands of the world. Space to explore. Space to go within yourself. Space to explore yourself deep inside. I have explained what it feels like in this story of Dhruva:
http://sajha.com/sajha/html/index.cfm?threadid=85662
I felt engaged and absorbed in my meditations. I was very curious to explore the potential of what I was doing. The spiritual practices completely engrossed me. I was enchanted about the fact that having an experience like this was even possible. I was entranced by the beauty. I was fascinated that this dimension in the universe existed. The more I practiced, the more my interest level grew. I was simply intrigued by the possibilities. As time went on, I got more and more involved. My consciousness was spell-bound by the mantras that I chanted. I felt high stimulated with energy, that I can describe by no other terms than spiritual.
It was very inspiring to see the example of the other monks. I was amazed at their discipline. They led very rigorough and regimented life. My own families style of operating had been very chaotic. My parents fought a lot. So I was very happy and peaceful to be in an environment of tranquilty. The focus was only on spiritual practice. It filled me with a deep inner peace, love, reverence for spirituality. And I explored with abandon. I was a teenager. I was curious. I wanted to see where all this would take me.
In economics, there is a term: Supply creates it's own demand:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supply_creates_its_own_demand
If spirituality was an economic product, then it's presence created a huge demand from within me. The more I supplied myself spiritual practices and experiences, the more my heart demanded more of it. I feel that there was a vacuum in my life before I had the temple/monastery experience. It was a vacuum for a need for stability, beauty, coherence, continuity. I was looking for something solid to invest myself in. And once I experienced the tangible experiences of spirituality, I just could not get enough. I was like the starving beggar from Pashupatinath who had a feast laid in front of him.
To be continued....
You have requested me to continue with my story, so I do.
Bitter truth, thank you for sharing your profound words. You should write more, my friend. You have amazing realizations.
Dear friends,
Yesterday, I took a walk. I took a long long walk. I needed to. Inside myself, I felt over-crowded. The demands of work, family, friends had crowded in on me. I try to meet these demands in my life. It gives me great pleasure to do so. But I was realizing yesterday that there is little space in my room for more.
I was realizing that I need to live life at the pace that I fnd it beautiful. Live too slow and the world looks ugly. Live it too fast and the world get's ugly. I need to live it at the speed of poetry.
Poetry is the language of the soul. And in our modern day of living in the rat race, it is this inner-poetry that is so easy to lose touch with.
My family could use more of my service. My work could use more of my service. I could always find ways to earn more money. More and more and more. I get so involved in the world that I don't even realize that I have lost touch with my inner poetry.
Well, when I was living in the monastery, it was very easy to maintain this poetry and be in touch with inner-beauty. There were very few demands of the external world. I lived as a monk. I had a regulated schedule I woke up at 3:45 A.M everyday. I went for celebrations. Ceremonies. Think of them as spiritual parties. It was a spiritual theme party that took the time to appreciate the beauties of the universe. There was serenity.
There was space at the temple to explore and find your own inner beauty. Modern day living does not give me this kind of space. I have to fight very hard to get the kind of space I want, the kind of space I enjoyed as a teenager living at the monastery.
So at this monastery, because of the theme, the mood and the other monks, the mood was very concentrated. The mood was very thick. It was very focussed. And you didn't have to be embarrased about pursuing your search for beauty with zeal. Finding beauty in this world is not easy. There is so much in the world that is ugly. But the spiritual practices made finding beauty so much easier.
The biggest thing you first find is space. Space from the demands of the world. Space to explore. Space to go within yourself. Space to explore yourself deep inside. I have explained what it feels like in this story of Dhruva:
http://sajha.com/sajha/html/index.cfm?threadid=85662
I felt engaged and absorbed in my meditations. I was very curious to explore the potential of what I was doing. The spiritual practices completely engrossed me. I was enchanted about the fact that having an experience like this was even possible. I was entranced by the beauty. I was fascinated that this dimension in the universe existed. The more I practiced, the more my interest level grew. I was simply intrigued by the possibilities. As time went on, I got more and more involved. My consciousness was spell-bound by the mantras that I chanted. I felt high stimulated with energy, that I can describe by no other terms than spiritual.
It was very inspiring to see the example of the other monks. I was amazed at their discipline. They led very rigorough and regimented life. My own families style of operating had been very chaotic. My parents fought a lot. So I was very happy and peaceful to be in an environment of tranquilty. The focus was only on spiritual practice. It filled me with a deep inner peace, love, reverence for spirituality. And I explored with abandon. I was a teenager. I was curious. I wanted to see where all this would take me.
In economics, there is a term: Supply creates it's own demand:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supply_creates_its_own_demand
If spirituality was an economic product, then it's presence created a huge demand from within me. The more I supplied myself spiritual practices and experiences, the more my heart demanded more of it. I feel that there was a vacuum in my life before I had the temple/monastery experience. It was a vacuum for a need for stability, beauty, coherence, continuity. I was looking for something solid to invest myself in. And once I experienced the tangible experiences of spirituality, I just could not get enough. I was like the starving beggar from Pashupatinath who had a feast laid in front of him.
To be continued....
Last edited: 14-Nov-11 09:47 AM