ty confused for quoting me. but on revision I changed the last line to: People say "forget and forgive" and I am not a hateful person but I can't forget and I won't forgive. thanks again. here is something i just read in a interpersonal communications book...i am trying to learn how to talk, communicate...:) - There is an old joke about a man who was asked if he could play a violin and answered, "I don't know. I've not tried." This is psychologically a very wise reply. Those who have never tried to play a violin really do not know whether they can or not. Those who say too early in life and too firmly, "No, I'm not at all musical," shut themselves off prematurely from whole areas of life that might have proved rewarding. In each of us there are unknown possibilities, undiscovered potentialities- and one big advantage of having oprn self-concept rather than a rigid one is that we shall continue to expose ourselves to new experiences and therefore we shall contnue to discover more and more about ourselves as we grow older. - S.J. Hayakawa. mG.