Posted by: kalomanche February 4, 2010
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Part V
October 1999
The wind was swaying very differently for Sheila! Life was never the same like it was or like the way she wanted. She missed being his source of inspiration and carrying that energy over to make it hers’! Every now and then she spent hours thinking what if things had not changed, what if she could make plans of seeing him her forthcoming spring break, what if she could call him at his work amidst his busy schedule just to whisper a soft ‘I miss you’, what if and what not….She was over with the toughest time frame of her life! She was over being devastated, she recuperated in her studies, she no more felt like killing herself, no more drove to far away empty spots where she could scream in his absence, she no more frequented the places the two had visited together to cherish her memories, no more cried herself to sleep or awaken to have realized he did not call her that morning. Yet, she couldn’t get over asking herself if she ever crossed his mind, just like he did everyday!
Change was coming along one at a time. She resumed her diet and her daily life style. She did not know if she was happy but she was definitely not sulking any more. She hadn’t forgotten, but she had learned to smile and laugh once again. The untimely disappearance of one of the most vital person of her life left her torn but she was learning to take one thing at a time, slowly but successfully. But, no matter how hard she tried to avoid, she often found herself dwelling in thoughts and imaginations of the past, the bitter/sweet memories which she had learnt to live with.
One evening, when she was browsing during her regular web-hours, a window popped up – ‘burp_aloud@yahoo.com is online’. Thoughts beyond words started racing, nostalgia over-poured and she clicked at the window to see his display picture. It was changed from the last time she saw him in that blue J-Crew shirt! It was an American Eagle this time and no he wasn’t by himself! This time there was a female figure standing next to him. After almost like a year, she found her pulses pounding again like a bat out of hell and could feel that adrenaline rush. She clicks on the display picture not to look at him or her, but to look at THEM, how close they were standing! That she is his legally married wife, that they spend their days and nights together was not a concern at that point of time for Sheila. She just wanted to see if he was standing close enough to her, within the physical proximity that they could feel each others’ warmth. Upon realizing that he in fact has his arms around her, just like in their last picture together where Burpy stands right next to Sheila; she found her eyes soaked, heart overwhelmed, and histrionic herself wooed, once again!
.................................................
Part V
October 1999
The wind was swaying very differently for Sheila! Life was never the same like it was or like the way she wanted. She missed being his source of inspiration and carrying that energy over to make it hers’! Every now and then she spent hours thinking what if things had not changed, what if she could make plans of seeing him her forthcoming spring break, what if she could call him at his work amidst his busy schedule just to whisper a soft ‘I miss you’, what if and what not….She was over with the toughest time frame of her life! She was over being devastated, she recuperated in her studies, she no more felt like killing herself, no more drove to far away empty spots where she could scream in his absence, she no more frequented the places the two had visited together to cherish her memories, no more cried herself to sleep or awaken to have realized he did not call her that morning. Yet, she couldn’t get over asking herself if she ever crossed his mind, just like he did everyday!
Change was coming along one at a time. She resumed her diet and her daily life style. She did not know if she was happy but she was definitely not sulking any more. She hadn’t forgotten, but she had learned to smile and laugh once again. The untimely disappearance of one of the most vital person of her life left her torn but she was learning to take one thing at a time, slowly but successfully. But, no matter how hard she tried to avoid, she often found herself dwelling in thoughts and imaginations of the past, the bitter/sweet memories which she had learnt to live with.
One evening, when she was browsing during her regular web-hours, a window popped up – ‘burp_aloud@yahoo.com is online’. Thoughts beyond words started racing, nostalgia over-poured and she clicked at the window to see his display picture. It was changed from the last time she saw him in that blue J-Crew shirt! It was an American Eagle this time and no he wasn’t by himself! This time there was a female figure standing next to him. After almost like a year, she found her pulses pounding again like a bat out of hell and could feel that adrenaline rush. She clicks on the display picture not to look at him or her, but to look at THEM, how close they were standing! That she is his legally married wife, that they spend their days and nights together was not a concern at that point of time for Sheila. She just wanted to see if he was standing close enough to her, within the physical proximity that they could feel each others’ warmth. Upon realizing that he in fact has his arms around her, just like in their last picture together where Burpy stands right next to Sheila; she found her eyes soaked, heart overwhelmed, and histrionic herself wooed, once again!
.................................................