prankster: However kind you may be, there is no way..

Posted by: prankster January 8, 2010

However kind you may be, there is no way around the fact that this is going to hurt the other person. All you can do is try to minimize the pain. It's just like ripping off a sticking plaster - if you rip it off all in one go, the pain will be over quickly, but if you do it slowly, it will hurt for longer.

Do not break up with the person by phone, instant message, or e-mail; this is disrespectful. Have the decency to do it privately and in person.

Try to avoid placing blame on the other person for the break up. Reflect carefully on the reasons for your decision to break up and be prepared to justify them without blaming your partner.

Be prepared for a range of emotions. When you finally break up with them, you have to be prepared for anything they give you. It could be sadness, anger, or even a lack of emotion. Also, make sure you know for sure that this is the right choice, otherwise it's possible that you may be convinced to give them another chance.

After, tell the person that you hope to stay in touch and that you still care about them.

And if you don't really want to be friends with her, don't say,"Oh, but we can still be friends." It hurts more if you avoid her.

Never go and brag to your friends that you broke up with her because all that will do is spread to her and make it all more painful.

For a while after, try not to date any of her friends or anyone in her "crowd" because if you break up with her, you will never get a date in that crowd again. Word will spread in that crowd that you broke up with two girls, and all of the others will think you'd break up with them too.

Don't be hurt if they start to hate you. Sometimes, after the sad stage, they will enter the hate stage. Don't be hurt by this. Everyone "heals" in different ways; this is just their way of forgetting about their pain.

src: http://www.wikihow.com/Break-Up-with-Your-Girlfriend-Nicely

More?

So you started a relationship with a cute, sweet girl who turned out to be an emotional wreck and possibly mentally insane. No problem, the hardest part is breaking up...err, actually it might be staying broke up, but first things first. Realize that any relationship you are in should improve both people's lives, and in this case focus on how your life currently is compared to how you would like it to be. If your life is not going the way you want it to, then follow these seven steps to break up with your girlfriend:

1. Take a break from each other - Tell your girlfriend you're taking some time alone (and give her a definite day when you will be done). Keep it to about a week or two at the most, since at this point in the relationship things are probably rocky and you don't want to draw out the pain too long. It is crucial that you not see her or speak to her at all (or as little as possible). The reason you want to be completely away from her is so that your mind and body can clear the emotions which are clouding your reasoning and judgment. She will probably fight with you about this saying that 'she really needs you right now', or try to put some other guilt trip on you, but you must be firm and stand your ground.

2. Make a decision - Once your head is cleared and you've taken a step back from your situation, figure out what is best for you. Decide who and what you believe and be brutally honest with what kind of person your girlfriend really is. Does she lie? Have you suspected her of cheating? Can you trust her? Are you counting on her to change even though she has given you signs that she doesn't want to? Do you see a future with this woman and even the possibility that she could be the mother of your kids? Are you counting on the future to be different than what it is now (even though it will most likely be more of the same). Do you have ulterior motives for keeping this relationship alive (such as satisfying your family or friends, you don't think you will be able to find anyone else, etc)? Ask yourself, how would a real man act in this situation? Don't stay in a relationship just because you have 'history', it may be bad history and you want to end that as soon as possible.

3. Make a plan - If you've decided to end it, then you must figure out the implications when you break the news. Does she have possession of anything of yours that is valuable such as expensive electronics, memorabilia etc? Are the both of you in any joint contracts or ownership agreements such as real estate loans, car payments, credit cards, etc? Figure out a way that you can get out of any agreements and get your stuff back safely in case she flips out and goes on a rampage (such as having a mutual friend get your stuff while she is gone, etc).

4. Tell her your decision - Communicate to her in person exactly how you feel and what you've decided. Remember, the decision is over so do not ask, beg, or plead but tell her in a mature manner that is not spiteful, immature, or childish. Be prepared for threats against you or herself. Do not cave under the pressure; she will probably try to get you to reconsider any way possible. Expect tears. If she is seriously suicidal (and not just trying to manipulate you), then you should arrange for her friends to be nearby when you break the news and possibly some medical help as well.

5. Hold your ground - Forever. Do not doubt yourself or be swayed, the decision is final. Realize that people can change, but the chances are very small and any changes she may make in the future are most likely just surface changes not personal transformation.

6. Avoid her completely - Do not email, speak, or see her until you are comfortable with the idea of her having sex with someone else, then you can talk to her again (but with extreme caution and very limited). Remember, after you break up, it is crucial for your emotional connections to be severed completely so you can be truly free from her (this can take months or sometimes even years).

7. Be a man about it - If you decide to be 'friends' with her, be cordial and mature about it. Don't bring up old issues but treat her as a new guy friend. Don't be needy or go out of your way to help her, and especially don't fall into mind games. If she tries to make you jealous, hit on you, or bring up old issues, stop her immediately and remind her you are only friends and if she keeps it up you are outta there!

src: http://ezinearticles.com/?how-to-break-up-with-your-girlfriend&id=293223

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