Posted by: atro November 28, 2009
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Disclaimer : My response are based on my personal experience and observation. You have the right to disagree or agree and I'm not responsible if you get offended by any reason whatsoever.
I do not think OP posted any non sense question. Instead of narrowing down to a particular case, I think people need to look at the bigger picture.
"Every time, When Nepalese guys talk to me, they always wants to know my last name"
It's all about mentality and how the society and tradition affects an individual. Most of the time, Nepalese men (not all) think about all sort of compatibility. They are more moved by what society finds appropriate in regards to maintaining relationship. Racism or call it caste discrimination is a huge deal in Nepalese society. The new generation of educated Nepalese could deny being racist but everyone is racist to certain extend, only the degree varies. Whether to satisfy their parents or to be acceptable by the society, race plays a huge role.
"Actually, after long time what I have learn is, they are more confident to talk with a girl whose last name is same as theirs'"
Again, pointing back the same phenomenon. I do not think that they are acutely interested in your last name rather they are interested in your caste. Your last name will point to your caste. I am assuming most of the Nepalese men you date are in a position where they want to settle down. To pursue this they need someone compatible with their caste so that later the society does not look down upon their relationship. I am also assuming that you are dating Nepalese men somewhere around 23-29 age range who are fall under DJM (Degree Job Marriage) trend. To ensure that they keep their parents happy and to be widely accepted by the society they are forced to check the caste compatibility.
" I couldn't even think about Nepalese guys dating Latino, black, Pacific Islanders."
Very true. Below are some of the reasons;
1. Majority are students who work and go school full time, hence they don't have time to date even Nepalese forget about other race.
2. Most of them are interested in getting drunk till they puke and are always involved in Nepalese only party. Hence, chances of socializing with women of other race are minimal.
3. Majority of Nepalese try to restrict themselves in a Nepalese only community. Where ever they go they have Nepalese around like school, work, parties vacation etc.
4. Fear of rejection and lack of confidence. How many times will you see a Nepalese dude walking up approaching a blond or brunette at a bar?
5. Most cannot think outside the box in regards to race and interracial relationship.
I am not sure why majority of Nepalese community overlook or don't pay any attention to issues that are important. Although OP comments may be self centered but why do people feel butt hurt when they have to talk about sensitive issue? I understand that society plays a vital role in shaping our perception in regards to how things are supposed to be done but there are times one needs to think critically.
Some personal thoughts:
Yes, I agree "Race Ain't matter when you date!!!." I date all kinds of women regardless to race and cultural background. Now I'm not going to prepare a brag list here but however I will tell you this; focus on individual personality more then judging people with their color. Yes, race and cultural background does play an essential role in everyone's lives but it should not be considered a major no-go when it comes to dating or relating.
I do not think OP posted any non sense question. Instead of narrowing down to a particular case, I think people need to look at the bigger picture.
"Every time, When Nepalese guys talk to me, they always wants to know my last name"
It's all about mentality and how the society and tradition affects an individual. Most of the time, Nepalese men (not all) think about all sort of compatibility. They are more moved by what society finds appropriate in regards to maintaining relationship. Racism or call it caste discrimination is a huge deal in Nepalese society. The new generation of educated Nepalese could deny being racist but everyone is racist to certain extend, only the degree varies. Whether to satisfy their parents or to be acceptable by the society, race plays a huge role.
"Actually, after long time what I have learn is, they are more confident to talk with a girl whose last name is same as theirs'"
Again, pointing back the same phenomenon. I do not think that they are acutely interested in your last name rather they are interested in your caste. Your last name will point to your caste. I am assuming most of the Nepalese men you date are in a position where they want to settle down. To pursue this they need someone compatible with their caste so that later the society does not look down upon their relationship. I am also assuming that you are dating Nepalese men somewhere around 23-29 age range who are fall under DJM (Degree Job Marriage) trend. To ensure that they keep their parents happy and to be widely accepted by the society they are forced to check the caste compatibility.
" I couldn't even think about Nepalese guys dating Latino, black, Pacific Islanders."
Very true. Below are some of the reasons;
1. Majority are students who work and go school full time, hence they don't have time to date even Nepalese forget about other race.
2. Most of them are interested in getting drunk till they puke and are always involved in Nepalese only party. Hence, chances of socializing with women of other race are minimal.
3. Majority of Nepalese try to restrict themselves in a Nepalese only community. Where ever they go they have Nepalese around like school, work, parties vacation etc.
4. Fear of rejection and lack of confidence. How many times will you see a Nepalese dude walking up approaching a blond or brunette at a bar?
5. Most cannot think outside the box in regards to race and interracial relationship.
I am not sure why majority of Nepalese community overlook or don't pay any attention to issues that are important. Although OP comments may be self centered but why do people feel butt hurt when they have to talk about sensitive issue? I understand that society plays a vital role in shaping our perception in regards to how things are supposed to be done but there are times one needs to think critically.
Some personal thoughts:
Yes, I agree "Race Ain't matter when you date!!!." I date all kinds of women regardless to race and cultural background. Now I'm not going to prepare a brag list here but however I will tell you this; focus on individual personality more then judging people with their color. Yes, race and cultural background does play an essential role in everyone's lives but it should not be considered a major no-go when it comes to dating or relating.