Behind every great woman, is a guy looking at her ass


Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids


When the lights are out, all women are beautiful


Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place


Smile... it's the second best thing to do with your lips


It's the good girls that keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time.


I'd like to meet the person who invented sex and see what they're working on now


My brain is my second favorite organ


No one has ever died from an overdose of pornography


Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer


I am a man of few words and a thousand obscene gestures


Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.


Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die


Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more.(Friend or Money !)


Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them


You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?


Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.