amit ji ,
  i dont know about america coz i am not there , but  u mention about dhotis why most of  nepalis says dhotis  here are the reasons.
  u dont think we are  not respecting them  saying dhotis ,we are respecting them also coz our mother and grand mother used to say ye bhayya ji, and the new generation start to say dhotis, coz they preserve there culture and we nepalese pointing them saying good well done from begining u guys are good to prevent ur culture so go a head more. if u think in a positive way u will get this conclusion.
  may be in america if some one says indian to them may be there are lots of indians such as (red, black etc etc) . so if some one says dhotis it means a people origannaly fro india not from some another country. its also in positive way .
   so what will u do if some one told u  gorkha , do u feel proud of that or feel embarrased?