This story is purely fictional. I do not mean to offend anyone by the use of caste discrimination in this story.

  When compared to the vast and diverse world, and all the people who live in it, the life of a single person seems insignificant. That is how she felt since she was a small girl. Do not get me wrong, it’s not that she did not have a good family, a good life or good education. In fact, she had more than an average Nepali girl of 8 years old can ever think of. She had a loving family, good food to eat, good education, and to be truthful she had everything that she desired. If she expressed the desire to acquire a certain toy, or a certain dress, she knew she would have it within a few days. When it came to beauty and brains she was as gifted as any 8 year old can possibly be. She always ranked at top of her class and had looks that often turned heads even at the age of 12. So why did she feel insignificant, you might ask. The fact being, she was too aware of the world and too aware of the ignorance of her upper-middle class family whose world revolved around petty things.

            Even at the mere age of 8, when normal girls play with their dolls and start worrying about their looks, and in this day and age- the boys in their class, she worried about how Sita didi was being treated at home. Sita didi was their household helper who belonged to a lower caste and therefore, was not allowed to enter the kitchen. Hajurmuwa did not eat anything that had been touched by anyone from the lower caste, hence Sita didi was doomed to do other household chores. That included doing the dishes, washing clothes with cold water, sweeping and mopping the floor and everything else that can be done in a household outside the kitchen. And by mopping the floor, I mean getting on her fours the traditional style and dipping her hands in ice cold water every two minutes in mid-winter. And what did she get in return? She hardly even got a smile of appreciation from anyone except Anushka (our 8 year old girl). Anushka asked endless questions about why Sita didi was treated like an inferior, why was she given different kind of food than everyone else in the household, and what did caste have to do with people. Her family would normally ignore her, or tell her things like “this is how it was from the time of their ancestors and who are we to refute it?” She sometimes even got answers like “these people have been brought up differently- this is what they are fit to do and they are getting paid for their work.”

            She never believed any of these things but was powerless to do anything about it. She would spend any free time with Sita didi and learned about her family and children. Sita didi’s husband had left her for another woman and had kicked her out of his house. He has also turned his back on the two children that they had together. Sita didi went to her brother’s home but her brother could not afford to support the two families. Out of desperation, she had looked for a job and taken the job as a helper in Anushka’s house as she did not have a good education. She saw her sons once a month or twice if she got lucky. Anushka could not understand why people had to suffer such different fates and why the material things like money mattered so much.

            When she came back from school one day, Sita didi was not there. When she asked about her whereabouts, she was told that Sita didi had left them to join her family. Though she felt sad about the departure of her trusted friend, she was happy that Sita didi could spend more time with her family. There were many Sitas, Gitas and Nitas that followed but she did not get close to any of them and slowly started accepting how things were. When her educated family thought that this was how things were supposed to be, who was she to argue that? After all, what could an insignificant girl like her do about it? She started caring more about school and less about what went on in her household and why the other Sitas suffered from this cruel fate. She finished school, and like every other youngster from the upper-middle class family in Nepal, she went to the U.S for her education.

             U.S was quite different from what she had thought it would be. It was not the glorious haven where all people were treated equally. It was not her escape from discrimination and prejudice. It was back like home where whites thought everyone else was inferior and everyone else thought whites were rich snobs. Everything was the same here- only she was Sita didi here, trying her best to pay for college. Though she could get everything she wanted back home, her parents could not even think of affording her college, and she could not even think of asking her parents to get a loan to pay for her college. She worked in the mall for an Indian, who tried his best to take advantage of her F-1 status. She labored for him 11 hours a day and received 50 cents under the minimum wage. She went to school two days a week and worked six days a week. She joked that she now had an eight-day week. On Thursdays she would go to school in the morning and work from 3-9 in the evening. She sometimes remembered her life back in Nepal where the only work she had to do was her homework. And here she was slaving away in the United States. Why had she come here? Only god knew. She was just following the trend and now she was here, feeling demoralized and inferior. She often wondered if this was how Sita didi felt. She was sure Sita didi did not feel how she felt, after all she had hopes for a good future and this was a temporary job, for Sita didi it was her destiny.

            Life went on as it does- and with time Anushka graduated, got a better paying job and with that- a better lifestyle. She also met a very handsome man who had passed his Uniform Certified Public Accountant Examination and had a wonderful job. He belonged to a lower caste, and hence the dilemma. Though she considered herself to be a highly educated woman from the modern era who loathed the mere mention of caste, she knew her parents thought caste was not only a status symbol but the core of every being. Your caste determined what kind of a person you are, what kind of upbringing you had, and how you would treat everyone else. If she asked her parents they would probably say that Nimesh was from a lower caste, hence had a bad upbringing and would treat people with no respect. She did not know if she could go on with this relationship, as she did not want to disappoint her parents.

            Nimesh had a very difficult childhood. One drunken night Nimesh bowled like a baby in Anushka’s arms and told her about his life. His guardians were not as fortunate as Anushka’s were financially, and it had taken its toll on him. His parents had died when he was young and his uncle and aunt had adopted him. Though they had never asked him for a lot, he knew that they could not afford to feed him along with his brother and three cousins. He was the oldest amongst the lot, hence he had started working since he was 14 years old. He was a smart boy and had taken utmost interest in his classes which enabled him to speak good English, which enabled him to get a job in Thamel. He worked in a shop there, and as it was a tourist spot, his English was a great asset. By the time he was 17, he was working in a hotel front-desk and by the time he was 21, he was the manager of the hotel. He was now supporting his brother, was able to help the family financially and also had some savings in his bank account. He applied to the United States for a Masters program in accounting when he was 23 years old. Not only did he get admission but he also received a 100% tuition waiver and a TA position that paid him $14,000 a year. He transferred most of his savings to his uncle’s account and came to the United States with the rest of it. He graduated from college two years later and was a certified accountant now.

            Anushka was astounded by what he had gone through and her life felt like a fairy tale in front of his. Rather than feeling like he was an inferior for all his struggles (which her family would probably feel), she fell more in love with him. She admired him for his strength and for his maturity. She felt hurt that he did not get to enjoy his childhood and had to take responsibilities in his little shoulders at such a young age. She was even more crushed to know that he had lost his parents at such a young age. She asked him if he remembered his parents. He said that he did not remember living with them but he often looked at his mother’s picture. She had died shortly after his father due to an accident. His uncle, who was his mother’s brother, had given him her picture. She asked if she could look at the picture. That picture made her head reel… looking at her from the picture was Sita didi!

            According to Nimesh, Sita didi had died when he was 9 years old which meant she was 8 years old at that time. She went back home that day and called her parents. After exchanging pleasantries with Aama, she asked the question that had been haunting her.

“Aama, do you remember Sita didi?” she had to know.

“Ko Sita? The maid we had when you were little?”

“Yes. The one who quit to join her family. Did she really leave to join her family when I was 8?”

“Where is this question coming from?” All of a sudden Aama sounded alarmed.

“Aama, you lied to me didn’t you?” She was mad that Aama would lie about something like this.

“What should I have done Anu, you were 8 and really attached to her.” Aama sighed.

“What happened aama?”

“It was a tragedy,” she replied. “Who would have known that Ramesh babu would go after a tallo jaat ko nokarni aimai (Ramesh was Anushka’s uncle, her father’s brother). He liked Sita, so he went to her room one day and told her how he felt. Ramesh babu already had a wife, but he thought that he could lure Sita by money to have an affair with him. Sita did not agree to his proposal so he tried to force himself on her. Sita was running away from Ramesh babu when a truck hit her in front of the house. You know how truck drivers are; they don’t want to pay anyone’s medical bills, so the truck came back and hit her again. Bichari was killed at the spot.  It was not like we did not take her to the hospital. We were even ready to pay for her treatment, but she was dead when we reached the hospital.”

Aama made it sound like she was about to do Sita didi a favor by paying for her medical bills. As if her family owed Sita didi nothing after what Ramesh kaka had attempted to do. She had never felt disgusted at her family’s way of thinking before.

“Why are you asking me this anyway?” Aama asked in a suspicious voice.

“Aama, I am in love and want to marry this guy.”

“Really? That’s great. I had kids by the time I was your age. Who is the guy? I hope you chose a nice guy from a good family and the right caste.”

“Yes Aama I did,” Anushka replied. “He is Sita didi’s elder son.”

            Anushka has been married to Nimesh for five years now. She is very happy and is expecting her first child in three months. It’s going to be a girl and they are going to name her Sita. Her family was against the wedding and is still taking time coming in terms with the idea that Anushka married Sita’s son. Her parents did not tell anyone what really happened to Sita that day, and the secret is still safe with aama, buwa, Ramesh kaka and Anushka. They don’t want Ramesh kaka to be insulted in front of the society. Anushka sometimes feels like telling Nimesh the truth about both his parents. The truth that she had learned about his father when she was eight and the truth she had learned about his mother five years ago. She has the urge to tell him again and again but does not want to take away the image that he has in his mind about his parents. Let them both be dead, and let them have led a happy life. This is the way it really should have been.