Monkeys & Girls both R same …….
They always fight only 4 bananas.
Whereas…..Boys & rats both R same ……
They always searching 4 new holes.

There’s an Englishman, an Irishman & a Scotsman all talking about their teenage daughters.
The Englishman says, ” I was cleaning my daughter’s room the other day & I found a packet of cigarettes. I was really shocked as I didn’t even know she smokes.”
The Scotsman says, “That’s nothing. I was cleaning my daughter’s room the other day when I came across a full bottle of Vodka. I was really shocked as I didn’t even know she drank.”
With that the Irishman says, “Both of you have got nothing to worry about. I was cleaning my daughter’s room the other day when I found a packet of condoms. I was really shocked. I didn’t even know she had a penis.”


One day Jane met Tarzan in the jungle.

She was very attracted to him and during her questions about his life she asked him what he did for sex.

‘What’s that?’ he asked.
She explained to him what sex was and he said ‘Oh, I use a hole in the trunk of a tree.’
Tarzan, you have it all wrong,’ she says horrified, ‘but I will show you how to do it properly.’
She took off her clothes, laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide.
‘Here,’ she said, ‘You must put it in here.’
Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the crotch.Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, ‘What the hell did you do that for?’
‘Just checking for bees,’ said Tarzan.