To all my friends, Thank you for sending me chain letters in 2006 because: * I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains. * I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS. * I smell like a dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer. * I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me. * I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo. * I stopped consuming several foods for fear that the estrogens they contain may turn me gay. * I also stopped eating chicken and hamburgers because they are nothing other than horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers that are bred in a lab so that places like McDonalds can sell their Big Macs. * I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick from the rat feces and urine. * I think I am turning gay because when I go to parties, I don't look at any babe no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice. * I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account, a sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. Funny that girl, she's been 7 since 1993....... * I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I wrote expecting the $150,000 total that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their special e-mail program. * But I am positive that all this is the cause of a stinking chain that I broke or forgot to follow and I got a curse from Satan himself. IMPORTANT NOTE: If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 10 seconds, a bird will crap on you today. If you didn't get it, this means: don't send me any more chain letters ;)