Racheeta, First thing you need to do is take that suicidal thought completely out of your mind (like everybody else said... duh!!!) Next thing, get involved, join a sorrority or any organization where you can be around more people. When you are around more people, more people will know you and you will be able to make more friends. Don't hesitate to go out and meet new people, you sound like you are in your 20s, THIS is the time to do "stuff" babe. Pacchi bya sya bhayepachhi ta responsiblity badchaa ani kei garna mildaina, ahile ta ho ni moj garne bhaneko, but by that i don't mean you should be careless. Theres so much things to do here in the US, all you need is just a little bit of confidence in yourself. I also had a gf in nepal when I left for the US, and we also ended up parting ways within not even a year. It happens, long term relationships are very hard to keep, but you know what.... YOU GOTTA DO WHAT YOU GOTTA DO! Dump that punk asss bf of yours and find another one, someone who will care more about you. Life is too short to be thinking about bullshiit like this all day, trust me, THERES TOO MANY FISH IN THE SEA!!