My GF dumped me :-(

Today, all of a sudden my GF called me to share one of the scandalous messages “Darling, we cant be together anymore” I was totally dumfounded that gave me sudden jerk. Well, it’s been a long relationship for about almost 2 years. Honestly speaking, at the outset, I took it as a fun affiliation; on the contrary, she was utterly drenched with my love. slowly but surely, I just took it for granted and met her when I needed. On the other hand, she used to call 10 times a day and sending countless messages which I hardly replied with real curiosity. Lucky, I was to be her first Boy Friend. Though we live in same city we meet hardly once or twice a week all because of my hectic schedule and some other things. She had always time for me, yes always. Whenever, we met she strike a chord me how much she loves and how her life has been complete after my ingress. “Honey, You are my Prince” She whispered many times kissing me tightly. After few 5-6 months I got jaded with her as I really did not like her as a Girl Friend, she was different, unique, tall, blonde and average looking girl. But I do not know why she did not attract me that much. However, things went on, I thought of ending relationship many times in between but I just assured myself “Man, there is nothing to lose”. During our relationship I spent few months abroad, and as traveling being my biggest passion, I made short trip around nearby countries though I always ran out of money. (Surprisingly, I never missed her in those trips, she mailed me everyday with everything she did from morning to evening). Bastard, I was, I did not carry even a postcard that barely costs a euro. She never grumbled anything, all she needed was me and my company and love. Then finally, I had to go to another continent for my study purpose for one semester “I unofficially ended the relationship from my side and finally excused her for not being so loyal to her, I admitted I could have been a better boy friend. At that time, I felt sorry for her and all the troubles I poured upon her. To my surprise she wrote me Next day “Man, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I want you to know you haven't treated me badly, ever, even though you seem to think so. You have always been so good to me, and I really mean always. But now it's time for you to leave for other country. And it's time to decide whether or not we'll continue together. I already said to you what I want. You, you, you. That is what I want. And I want it so badly. I hope and in a way I know that we'll continue this love story (don't mind the clichés I use all the time). Boy it's a long way, but why should it stop us? We love each other more than anything, more than we can say. I want you to be open with me, don't hold anything back. Tell me everything you want and feel and love and hate. “Then she added “I wanna share my stupid stuff with you, even the most stupid things I wanna tell you. I am ready to go through this long separation. Are you?” Then after spending a semester I again came back and she was there to welcome me with open arms. My feelings were same for her. We met like before and so on and on. Slowly I started loving her, I wanted to spend more time with her….I enjoyed being with her….which obviously she liked a lot. And suddenly she said she can’t be with me anymore coz she thought we r totally different and she is still puzzled if I am right person for her. When she divulged this yesterday I realized how much I liked her, I was about to burst into tears. I never expected such bitter news from her. I know it’s my entire fault not to take it seriously, similarly I am damn sure not to stay in that country for long where she wd love to spend her whole life, Marriage was not in our card (Neither mine nor her). If so, why I am so much worried now? Is it ego problem or a MAN thing? Today I wrote her a very long email (perhaps the longest) and we exchanged 20 SMSs. It seems she had absolutely determined to walk away from my life. I started feeling her absence right from that moment and I am begging for her love now. Never in my wildest imagination, I thought I would do that but I am dying to meet her now and to express everything. But she kept on repeating, we r very different to each other, she had seen me long and its time we drive different lanes. But she is still in dilemma and , she had not yet revealed we wr BROKEN UP. Then we r meeting finally to decide about this thing and spending a night together in her apartment, that could be the last night or …..I do not know…..I still have chance….Dear friend,s please tell me what should I do?????? Is it only my EGO that does not allow her to go or is this real love? I cant figure out anything.., I’m also not certain if I can change her mind….or Should I let her go her own away, time will heal everything, what I should I say…..how should we act?? I don’t know….what will happen if we re established our relationship? Can I change myself? I have no IDEA friends………………Im just f’*** up but one thing is sure I LOVE HER. (She is 20 years, European, a college student, better looking than me with European Standard height) Just now I wrote her SMS My princess, I will love you till the end of time Every breath of mine I'll hold you by my side But I'll rest in peace my sweetheart would you Let me die in your arms with you-