hmmm....gentlemen, we've got a 'situation' here :P infidelity ---->>>>>> is like bang, bang, bangbullets from an AK47 , innit? especially to those who are BRUTALLY honest with your partner, being cheated/used is the WORST experience of all. to me it's the WORST crime ever. on top of that, if it comes from a third person who happens to be your friend and your 'darling' acts as if he/she is completely oblivious about it...IT KILLS!!! so there, i can ALMOST completely feel what you're going through, my friend. please allow me some leverage to analyze some possible ramifications to the problem: 1) she had relationships in the past, BUT not noteworthy or of any seriousness. they were like casual dates that lasted for few days or months and slowly faded away in vain. 2) okay, she had affairs before. but she comes to you and says she had a bf/ bfs in the past. she even slept with X, Y or Z. but she was being used or the relationship did not work out-- wrong match or whatever. she has broken up with all, they have NOTHING to do with her anymore neither does she, whatsoever. MOST importantly, she is here standing honestly in front of you with a STRONG conviction. 3) same as 2) but she does NOT come to you and accept it because of the FEAR of having to lose you as a consequence. 4) same as 3) but she does NOT accept it because she is NOT sure about you and the relationship with you. in other words, she is still insecure. 5) she just needs "another man" for "time-pass". the most important thing that needs to be done NOW is proper communication between YOU and HER. call her and set up an appointment to meet. both of you, sit down, take a cup of coffee. add 2 spoonful of sugar and half-half milk. stir it and take a sip. if it's too cold, microwave it for a minute or two. :P. make your head cool, chill out and take all the time in the world to talk everything about it. try to find out if any of those five possibilities that i mentioned is existent. make sure you know the truth IN ITS ENTIRETY then, it is all up to YOU to decide. if you want my humble opinion, anything BUT (5) is worth forgiving. :-) LooTe