When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is. A woman was telling her friend , "It is I who made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him." Asked the friend. The woman replied, " A billionaire". After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice." It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss. Married life is frustrating. The first year of marriage, the man speaks And the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen. Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's. No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married. How Can A Stranger Tell If Two People Are Married? You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. What Do Your Think Your Mom and Dad Have In Common? Both don't want any more kids. Is It Better To Be Single or Married? It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need so meone to clean up after them. How Would The World Be Different If People Didn't Get Married? There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? How Would You Make a Marriage Work? Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck.