I have sailed far and wide. I have seen many beautiful faces. But nowhere in my sojourn, I met someone so nice, lovely, witty, wonderful, wholesome lady like you, my dear Lady Croft. You are too good to be true; too unreal to be real. I am truly, deeply and madly in love with you. You are the love of my life. Tell me, oh witty lady, where art thou? I will sail, surf, yacht and swim my way to be with the Aphrodite of my dreams. Only your love can bring me out of the seventh inferno that I am in. Oh, my lovely graceful, help me, won?t you? All my life, I have been wanting to drink coffee that is poured with passion, sweetened with love and served with affection. Will you be kind enough to serve me my cup of coffee every day, till death do us apart?