I have tried my best to bring a new item song in which lyrics/compose/vocal are mine (Ajit Ghimire). Could you please give me some feedback?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VYdqU6_wac&fbclid=IwAR10l1Lvs353mg3uLbiN1yV-ELGeXCpr2mqFo8huq87WUUsl6LFvUC1R8v4