Posted by: ghogay_moro December 14, 2018
Marriage Suggestions
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candlewood (that nick tho lol), don't second guess - there's nothing wrong with asking a very personal question, which lot of others aren't as comfortable asking in public. some think questions pertaining to love/relationship/marriage are so personal that it is humiliating to discuss publicly.

keyboard warriors will sling all the shit at you 'cos you know, everyone is entitled to his/her opinion. some of the opinions are from people who think no end of themselves, others are from people who have had no issues as life didn't deal them a full hand - they had straight choices to make and that worked for them, and think others should do the same. yet others think it is macho and manly to sort your issues yourself when it comes to courtship and relations. each to their own, bro. just shrug the negativity off. someone who has walked in your shoes will come by and let you weigh in your options. heck - some have had the courage, fortuity and luck to be bold enough to go for whatever life throws and made it to the other end, hence the swagger. but realize, it doesn't work that way for everyone.

there will be those who judge your success by the salary. others by the size of their house and cars. there are yet others who are out there barely surviving, life almost forgets to give them a break. an accountant in the US who just started a stable job at 30 after navigating all the hardships of a student in US is quite an achievement. ask that to a fellow student who's struggling to make ends meet and you will realize its worth. those who were the right folks in the right place and had right education and development opportunities to be where you are now, kudos to you too. just know - everyone doesn't get a similar head-start in life. and don't look down on others who are trying to make their ends meet.

if you come from a background like Ujeli baini (google Rajesh Hamal and Ujeli) it takes years of concerted effort to to get your stuff right, from mustering appropriate courage to resources to, you name it. starting a stable career in US at 30 is no small feat.

and by the way, being successful is not a race against others. it's your personal marathon to manage.

so those who think it is unmanly to ask personal questions, well, you have all the right to holler, but i ain't listening to the bluster. i will glean the good advise from it though.

all the sajha huff and bluster aside, to answer your question, (@candlewood or anyone in that situation) i would go with a person that would make you happier in your lifelong journey, a person who's full of life, humility, who's caring and compassionate than where she would work and how much money she would bring. someone who understands the ups and downs of the daily grind and look beyond the trees to see the forest. when shit hits the fan, this kind of person would be a good companion for next 50 or so yours you might live. if you can have all of the above and make more money, hey all the best.

otherwise, go with what socrates said: marry and if you get a good wife, you will enjoy life. else, you will become a philosopher lol.

best of luck.
Last edited: 14-Dec-18 03:51 PM
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