why are all these guys commenting and giving their biased views about nepali girls??? listen all you guys out there, you are no different from any nepali girls, you think nepali girls have attitudes then its your fault to understant it that wa. Nepali are very beautiful, kind, and honest girls. and its just you who behave different with them, that makes you think differernt about girls.
not only nepali girls, but even americans wont like you if you show attitiudes and think you are the most handsome hunk around them. We girls dont like guys who want every girl to treat them special, if we dont like anyone we just wont, no matter how hard you try we wont give a s*** about all those guys, and that is the reason you comment about girls

All of you want us to be a "sati sabitri", and someone who will stay at home and take care of you, and do whatever you say, but things are differnt and america is different, we have lot of things to worry about and boys, relationships are not our priority. We have careers, education, family back home who we need to take care of.
You guys just come and talk to us like you have never seen a girls before, give us a break you all, just change the way you all think about nepali girls....

कुकुरनी भनेको के! बुझिनस?

STOP PEOPLE!!! whats up with you?? i did not started this thread so that someone else could hinder sombody's dignity.

Nepalisahila,
I understand what you said, about nepali girls going out in clubs and dating americans. do you really think it is a bad thing to date someone?? you just want to know people and how they think thats why you make friends, isnt that right??
well what if a guy dates american girls and later decides to marry nepali girl? does that girl have to accept that guy no matter what his past was??? I think it is the same thing that u said about nepali guys marrying nepali girls. if we have to accpet men no matter what they are, then men too have to accept us in the same way.

ममता,

I am still trying to convince myself to that aspect of equality in men and women. But since I don't hang around with girls that much, I can't convince myself to live a life with that woman who has sleeps with guys as she pleases.
I am sorry to all those beautiful and nice hearted ladies against whom I have some cultural prejudice. I still want to respect their attitude but ... all I can say is I am happy for you ladies, if you are and will be, like the way you want to be.

Someone just said over here that American guys are sick and are only looking for..... Well I think thats just generalizing..they are human beings too and they have emotions too.. and about nepali guys.. i think there are a lot who are just looking into having sex with girls and thats true. Do u mean that girls get modernized wheras guys remain untouched for their to be wives? Dont u see so many guys running after girls all the time? And about nepali guys talking ablout girls well... thats nuthin new.. guys have been and will always be talking crap about girls. and in the end they go after the same girls. Seeking independence and enjoying one's life doesnt make the girl horrible. So according to me... u can speak all the crap u want.. and when finally a nice guy comes along the crap wont matter!!

I have nothing to say

we all have this habit of generalising others, first we say that ugly nepali girls have attitudes, girls in USA are not "proper" nepali girls and now"american guys are sick". does anyone know where we got this habit of generalising others? why dont we think before we throw out something.
i have met and have a lot of american guy friends. I think they are sweet, nice, friendly and all the guys friends i have met repect girls. I think everyone has this this called "sex" in our minds and thats something no one can get rid of. i have found American guys very curious about nepali culture and they think nepali girls are very traditional and hardworking.
well of course all american guys are not like that but we girls always have to watch out and be careful about guys around us and we try our best not to make "bad" guy friends. untill we are within our limit of our culture and own dignity I think it is totally fine to hangout with americans no matter kales or gores.

mamta and AeutiKT
i would give u an example of how "MAJORITY of FEMALE" change once coming to STATES. if somebody speaks to them in Nepali they would answer in ENGLISH. [ wow!!!. as if one forgot NEPALI the minute they LANDED in US.] Reflect this in your own life how many times u have done that honestly and u would figure out whether u really changed or not.

Thapap ji,
everyone has to change according to the surroundings. We all young generation are soo weak in nepali that we cannot even speak clear nepali. In my school among 12 subjects that i studied only one was in nepali and I was sooo weak in nepali that i always had to cheat in nepali exams. Its not that they are changed its the way we are brought up. I remember when i was in school we used to get punushed if we were found speaking nepali.
some people call the way we talk as being "stylish" its not stylish at all, when i was in nepal i used to use soo many english words when i talked to my parents and everytime i said something my sister had to translate it to nepali i used to be soo embarassed.
take it easy thapap ji, its all who we are and how we were brought up.

रिदम,

I praise you for having that aspect. 'Screw yourself till you please, and someone comes around and doesn't give a crap about it, all those won't matter.' Haha,
That's even one step ahead in getting americanized.
Well I say, that way you won't get a nice guy, you will get just someone like you, who's been unscrewing himself. Or that guy will be a nice one with a loose screw or a sort of social worker.

ममता
I understand you on not being able to speak nepali well. I have seen kids these days even nepal they speak english with some cool effect. But my point is, have you ever memorized any boys doing that? There are more boys who get advanced english education than girls in nepal, and they know, practice and learn english just as girls. But they don't show that fake cool accent effect,or do they?

nepalisahila

i kinda got what you said, but i am not exactly sure what "cool effect" means. when you talk english esp in US you have to have certain accent otherwise no one will undertand you.
ohh talk about guys.. i have experienced it.. if you go to parties guys just stare at us for no reason and try to give that "cool" smile (though it doesnt look good) and try sooo hard to impress girls. i think it is human nature to SHOW OFF, not only grils do that but guys do too. and esp when you are in nepali circle, people just want to show off whatever they have, be it those expensive gold jewelleries and sarees, or watches or cellfone, car,, it think it is in our culture to degrade other people by showing our belongings.
and i am no different than others. when i hang out with my own friends i just dress up like myself, but when i am going to a nepali party i have to look the best, and wear new beads or expensive dresses and want to look preety. and in your experience have you seen anyone in nepali parties who is not dressed right? guys and girls both???
you know its just us, we all got this SHOW OFF personality.

ममता

You are right about that 'cool smile' thing that guys give staring at girls and also that girls want to dress showing off a bit. As far as speaking english with cool effect is concerned, I meant girls didn't have to do that while speaking with a fellow nepali. I also try to avoid my accent when I speak to a foreigner.
Girls show off getting dressed better trying to look more beautiful and guys show themselves off trying to look the coolest and different one. I think it is universal, and it sounds romantic too. But the difference is, we take it too far and often there are fights in every parties. Girls should know that these 90% of the fights are because of them.

haha, This is why I stay the hell away from most Nepalese people. Of course, educated members of our community are great. My dad is a double masters engineer and you'll never hear him say or do some of the really idiotic things I've seen Nepalese men do.

I think it's usually fresh off the boat nepalese who behave stupidly, so I don't want to generalize. I know the Nepalese men in my family are well educated and well mannered and that's all great, but some of the men I've seen are just so stupid that it's beyond funny.

I once went to a Nepalese party and grown men drank too much and threw up!!! Can you believe it? And not just one, four or five of them. It was so disgusting.

Plus, if you're not super friendly then you get accused of trying to be white.

So my advice: if it's a fresh off the boat nepali man, avoid him like the plague.

I wanted to add a few things to Nepalisahila:

भग्वानले देको दिमाग्लाइ उपयोग् गर्न सिक । धन्यबाद् ।

Saying idiotic things like American guys are sick, and 90 % fights happen because of girls is really not very bright. Not only will it make you seem like an unintelligent individual, it will also further prove the general stupidity that some men have in nepal.

For example: if 90% fights happen because of girls, then isn't it the men who are stupid enough to let it affect them to that level?

So all in all, evolution has granted human beings a relatively efficient brain. It's only plausible that we repay nature and use this important organ.

Hare people lets not point at each other. Good and bads are everywhere. What might be best for someone may be worst for other and vise versa. We cant clap with one hand. Learn to respect people even once you break up with them. Where there is no pain there is no gain.

Thapapipuuu, being diplomatic huh? nice... :p

Well MAMTA if you only read my last statement:

Nothing related to the topci - but, Am I not understanding the whole statement of is it just me...lol but I have to take my view towards the other side of the closet...I think I am proud of all Nepalese Gals not just surviving to live out of the hell hole but struggling/surviving in the free world beyond Nepal where the culture/tradition is demoralized to a certain extend, I always felt sorry for Gals who felt like living in a jail cell who had to report to their parents at before the sunset. What is the difference between the two genders besides the sex organs? They are as intelligent as us whom they have proved it time and time.

As far as how they behave as they progress to survive and live outside the jail cell. Look at us for example, we are a good example. I bechu` all never did things infront of your parents before that you are freely doing it now. Lets take a good example of "MYSELF" I never would dare to smoke in front of my father/mother and that is no longer an issue. Drinking oh well never drank as much in my life - like a fish. So what if you see gals enjoying in the party sometimes, drinkin`smokin`having the best time of their life? Let it be let it be let it be.. Power to all Gender " wonder if gays and lez falls in this category" YES IT DOES

everyone comes from a different background. We can all be from the same country and every one of us can have a different views on everything thing they observe due to the experiences they had to go thru in life. Environment each one of us grow up in plays a key role on everything. One cannot just judge one person, just like that. If you do that you are no better than those others you complain of. Knowing why people do certain things and giving them the chance to talk and explain themself is always a better way than to just outright judge em. I know that everyone (including me) have or forms an opinion just by seeing people's behavior and some people are very biased as i am myself. But letting those bias views influence what you do is completely different. Shouldn't we learn from the past mistakes...shouldn't we just think before we post anything. Yes you want to share your opinions ...everyone does...and yes it will make you feel better ..but at what cost? shouldn't y ou think about what others might feel? What good are you if you don't care about others....what kind of role model will you be to others..to the future generation. Should everyone be live in ignorance. Some people change some people don't...share your ideas and opinions but don't direct it at anyone. Just say this is what i observed and these are things i think are a bit out of culture...don't go bashing on other people. If you were in their situation, maybe you would do the same thing. YOu never know everything until you ask them.... Some people do it for fun ...some people may have a good reason behind it all. Just because they are not what you think is within the conformity of the societal rules doesn't mean you can go ahead and generalize and just write crap. I know whatever I write here is just an opinion too..and if it's gets at your head...just ignore it..just like everyone does and will eventually.
I mean nothing by it....

माग्दालिना,

Well, first question, how long have you been here in the US? You boast of guys in your family like ladies do about their people and wealth in Nepal. So in my openion, you are not that changed as much either, since you want to stay away from off the boat nepalese guys.

" 90% fights happen because of girls, then isn't it the men who are stupid enough to let it affect them to that level?"

Well, in this case, I have nothing to say if it only blames guys coz I was looking for some descent contribution from ladies side as well. In the parties, guys are all drunk and I just thought ladies didn't want to see fights where they are either. Some men loose their screws a bit in the vicinity of women, it is true. I think ladies know that too. Just as some ladies are easily screwable.

Hi guys,

I have seen a lot 'highborough' effect in Nepalese . All the time they are occupied with show - off, trying to prove that they belong to some clan ,caste or well off background.

C'mon have some humility, accept and be proud of what you are and don't try to project what you are not. No attitudes, no issues and no gender prejudices and we are all done.

Peace

Life is a great leveller. The recent research (asti trivia ma ni sodya thiyo) suggests:
Men on average think of sex every 7 seconds, but it is women who are more likely to cheat on their stable partners :).

On a more serious note, the debate of Men and Women, especially in terms of nepali context is never ending. Forget the gender issues, when was the last time we agreed on anything unanimously? Talk to some of the scholarly pundits, and they don't even agree that we need peace first in Nepal. Aroo ta k kura garai bho ra? Malai ta same ol criteria: lamo kapal, lil bit nepali bhawana and no nataks :)

"Men on average think of sex every 7 seconds, but it is women who are more likely to cheat on their stable partners :)"

Interesting. US men/women? You shouldn't forget the domain of representativeness of the sample!

I guess ONLY US POPULATION OF COURSE, cause we're not allowed to generalize in sajha ;) (now is that generalizing?).

btw, congratulations echoes dai for ghar grihasthi!