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 dami Nepali jokes

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Posted on 10-17-11 12:45 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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 एकपटक प्लेनको यात्रामा राजेश दाइ र रजनीकान्तको अचानक जम्काभेट भएछ। वल्र्डकै टप टु पर्सन एउटै स्थानमा भेट भएपछि दुई जनामा बाजी परेछ। रजनीकान्तले सोधेको प्रश्नको उत्तर राजेश दाइले दिन नसके ५ डलर र राजेश दाइले सोधेको प्रश्नको उत्तर रजनीले दिन नसक्दा ५ सय डलर तिर्ने सहमति भयो। रजनीकान्त : पृथ्वी र चन्द्रमामा के फरक छ ?

उत्तर नआएर राजेश दाइले चुपचाप ५ डलर तिरेछन्। 

राजेश दाइ : कुन जनावर तीनवटा खुट्टासहित हिमाल यात्राको क्रममा जान्छ, र्फकंदा चारवटा खुट्टासहित र्फकन्छ ?

रजनीकान्त दुई घन्टासम्म सोच्दा पनि उत्तर नआएपछि ५ सय डलर दिन बाध्य हुन्छन्। 

रजनीकान्तले सोध्छ :  उत्तर के हो ?

राजेश दाइ फेरि शान्त भएर ५ डलर फिर्ता दिन्छन्, किनभने उत्तर नआएपछि उनले  ५ डलर मात्र तिर्नु पर्ने हुन्छ। 


from saptahik...
dami chaina ta sathi ho???

 
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Posted on 10-17-11 11:06 AM     [Snapshot: 265]     Reply [Subscribe]
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ONE MORE: 

 Shere र श्रीमती मा झगडा भयो |
Shere घर छोडेर गयो |
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Shere (श्रीमती सँग फोने मा)
आज खानामा के के पकाकी छौ? 
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श्रीमती :- बिष poison 
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Shere :- ठीक छ तिमी खायर सुत म आज घर अबेला आऊँछु |

 
Posted on 10-18-11 1:27 AM     [Snapshot: 695]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 What is the difference between wife & saali?

Saali is Beauty, Wife is duty,

Saali is passion, Wife is tension,

Saali is patakha, Wife is jhatka,

Saali is cool, Wife is fool,

Saali is tuty-fruity, Wife is qismat futi,

Saali is fresh cake, Wife is earth quake…:


 
Posted on 10-18-11 11:11 AM     [Snapshot: 931]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 लोग्ने स्वास्नी झगडा
मंगल - तिमीहरु लोग्ने स्वास्नी सँधै झगडा किन गरिरहन्छौ हँ ?
संगल - किन भने हाम्रो पहिलो भेट नै वादविवाद प्रतियोगितामा भएको थियो, त्यसैले ।
 
Posted on 10-18-11 11:12 AM     [Snapshot: 938]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 एकजना जवान केटिले उमेर पाकेको धनि बुडोसँग विहे गरेपछि पत्रकारले सोधेछन
पत्रकार : तपाईले उहाँमा के देख्नुभो विहे गर्नलाई ।
केटि : एउटा उहाँको इन्कम अर्को उहाँको दिन कम ।
 
Posted on 10-18-11 11:48 AM     [Snapshot: 1001]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Ek din kta afnu gf ko bau lai bhetnu gayecha:

boy to his girlfriends father: MA TAPAI KO CHORI KO HAAT MAAGNA AAYEKO. . .
father: KINA?
Boy: KINA KI ABA MERO HAAT DHERAI THAKI SAKE. . . . TESAILE
 
Posted on 10-18-11 12:15 PM     [Snapshot: 1039]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Posted on 10-18-11 7:13 PM     [Snapshot: 1233]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Once a Jew was walking down a street. On his way he saw a hot sexy blonde with perfect 10 body. Seeing her, he could not restrain his emotions. He was lost to the lust. All he could think about were those two sets of beautifully blossomed bosom. So he walked up to the blonde and asked her.

Jew: I will give u $100 if u let me bite ur tits.

(The blonde was oviously furious)
Blonde: Are u crazy? No way...

(With the presence of such a sexy body to his close proximity, the Jew was reluctant to back up)
Jew: Ok ok. I will give u $1000.
Blonde: Get lost u perv...

(All that was in the Jew's mind were those pair nice racks)
Jew: Ok ok I will give u $10,000.

(The blonde thought for a while and convinced herself "What the hell, it's easy money" so she agreed to let him have his way. She started to undress her top and let the Jew enjoy the treat. The Jew passionately fondled it, caresses it, licked it, buried his head between the curvatures, honked it and did whatever that pleased him but he did not bite it. This went for more than 30 mins so the blonde was irritated so)

Blonde: Aren't u gonna bite it?
Jew: Nah, I will pass. It's too expensive.


 
Posted on 10-19-11 12:15 AM     [Snapshot: 1483]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 .One more.........


Mohan : I love you ko artha k hunchha ?

Urbashi : Ma TImilai maya garchhu .

Mohan : Gazzab chha ba, timisanga english ma euta question k
sodhe, timi masanga Prem garna thaleu ?
 
Posted on 10-19-11 12:16 AM     [Snapshot: 1485]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 पांग्रेले एउटा रोबोट किनेर ल्याएछ । त्यो रोबोटले झूटो बोलेको पत्ता लाउँथ्यो र झुटो बोल्नेलाइ झापड हानी हाल्थ्यो 
पांग्रेको छोरोः बा, आज पेट दुख्या छ म स्कूल जान्न (झड्याम्म) 
पांग्रे - देखिस, झुटो बोल्नुको नतिजा, म तँ जत्रो हूँदा कहिले झुटो बोल्दिनथेँ (झड्याम्म) पांग्रेको बुढीः देख्नुभो त । आखिर छोरो तपाइँकै त हो नि ?? (झड्याम्म)
 
Posted on 10-19-11 11:26 PM     [Snapshot: 1838]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 एकदिन हर्के घर ढिला पुग्यो
उसको बाउले किन ढिला आइस भनेर सोध्दा हर्केले साथीको घर मा थिए भन्यो
उसको बाउले हर्केकै अगाडी उसको१०जना साथीलाई फोन गर्यो
पहिलो ४ जना : uncle यहि छ मा संगै छ
अर्को २ जना : uncle , भर्खर निस्क्यो आउदै होला
अर्को ३ जना : येही छ uncle पढीराखेको छ फोन दिउ
last को १ जना : भन्नुस daddy बोल्दै छु
 
Posted on 10-19-11 11:32 PM     [Snapshot: 1859]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 बुढा र बुढी छोरा को अगाडी झगडा गर्दै
थिए:
बुढी: त साला कुकुर !
बुढा: त साली कुकुर्नी !!!
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बच्चा : ही... ही... ही... !!! म
साला पप्पी !!!

 
Posted on 10-20-11 9:09 AM     [Snapshot: 2006]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 सडकमा दुर्घटना भएको रहेछ, घाइते वरिपरी नीकै भिड थियो|

शेरेले नीकैबेर देखी भिडले गर्दा घाइतेलाइ हेर्न पाएको थिएन त्यसैले उसले एउटा जुक्ति निकालेछ र चिच्याएछ: 'त्यो घाइते मेरो बा हो'

सबैजना छक्क पर्दै शेरेतीर हेर्दै बाटो छोडी दिएछन्,
शेरे अगाडी गएपछि देखेछ, घाइते त कुकुर पो रहेछ ...!!
 
Posted on 10-21-11 9:08 AM     [Snapshot: 2264]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 डाक्टर: आपके 3 दांत कैसे टूट गए?
संता: जी वो मेरी पत्नी ने कड़क रोटी बनाई थी!
डाक्टर: तो खाने से मना कर देते!
संता: जी वही तो किया था!
 
Posted on 10-21-11 9:08 AM     [Snapshot: 2265]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 संता ने कुकिंग कांटेस्ट में हिस्सा लिया और खाली बर्तन में चम्मच हिलाने लगा!
जज ने उससे पूछा: क्या बना रहे हो?
संता: उल्लू!
 
Posted on 10-21-11 12:52 PM     [Snapshot: 2382]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Patient: Doctor please help me...Lately I feel pain every where I touch. I touch my leg and it hurts. I touch my belly and it hurts too..It also hurts when I touch my head. Everywhere I touch I feel pain.

The doctor takes a good observation of his situation..

Doctor: Ok I see what the problem is.

Patient: Doctor please what is it?

Doctor: Its because you have a broken finger...

 
Posted on 10-21-11 1:14 PM     [Snapshot: 2424]     Reply [Subscribe]
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 goodass: that patient must be a blonde! haha
 
Posted on 10-21-11 2:41 PM     [Snapshot: 2485]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Sardar ji was suffering from episodes of terrible recurring headaches. So he went to a doctor and did all the tests. He was told to come after a week for the result and so he did.

Doctor: I am terribly sorry but you have a tumor in your brain...

Having heard the news, Sardar ji was all excited and started to dance. Tonaktunatun Tonaktunatun Tonaktunatun tanana....Aree balle balle...While he was cherishing, the doctor was standing next to him all surprised...

Doctor: Didn't you heard what I just told? You have a brain tumor.
Sardar ji: Oh I heard it alright.
Doctor: Then what is the purpose of this celebration?
Sardar ji: At least now I know I have a brain.

 
Posted on 10-21-11 2:44 PM     [Snapshot: 2518]     Reply [Subscribe]
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One day a high class businessman was waving for a taxi ride. Suddenly his hand was severed from his body by a speeding vehicle...The business man was obviously upset...He said: MY ROLEX.....

 
Posted on 02-25-16 7:46 PM     [Snapshot: 14415]     Reply [Subscribe]
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शिब र भुवन हस्पिटलमा रुदै बसेको देखेर अचम्म मान्दै -
राजेश दाई : ओए ...शिबे, किन रोको यार त...?
शिब : Blood Test गर्न भनेर मेरो औला नै काटी दियो यार ..!!
राजेश दाई: अनि भुवने, त चाहीँ किन रोईराको ... ?
भूवन : मेरो त Urine Test गर्न पर्छ रे ...उ हु उ हु
 
Posted on 02-26-16 1:55 PM     [Snapshot: 14823]     Reply [Subscribe]
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We were decorating cubical for asst supervisor's upcoming birthday , there was a packet of 14 latex balloons and it has yellow warning sign.
One of the coworker was trying to read it loud " it can choke or suffocate, discard broken balloon " , then there was voice came  "don't use it as Condom"
Last edited: 26-Feb-16 03:32 PM

 



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