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Posted on 07-31-04 11:39 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to
the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death
experience.

Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?" God said, No, you
have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the
hospital and have a facelift, liposuction, and a tummy tuck.

She even had someone come in and change her hair color.
Since she had so much more time to live, she figured
she might as well make the most of it.

After her last operation, she was released from the
hospital.

While crossing the street on her way home, she was
killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you
said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me
from out of the path of the ambulance?"

( You'll love this!!!)

God replied, "Sorry, I Couldn't recognize you??!!"

 
Posted on 08-01-04 1:46 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Nice one Melina...:)
 
Posted on 08-03-04 1:36 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Good one, Melina !!

ok, let me continue with another God joke. But, for this one, we will have to get rid of the American god ( the woman had liposuction and everything, so ) and head straight back to our very own Nepal.

**********

Eka desh ma, our very own Shiva bhagwan was getting bored staying all day in Kailash Parbat.

So, one day, he told Parbati, "Budi, I am bored staying here all day. So, today I shall go to Nepal, and see how people over there are living nowadays."

So, away went Shivaji from Kailash Parbat and straight to Phasupatinath mandir. And, guess what, the day happened to be "Shiva Ratri."

Shivaji disguised himself as any other normal person and was strolling around the temple. After some time, he came across a few nepali boys gathered in a corner. So, he thought of speaking to them.

And, no wonder, the boys were trying gaja and bhang and what not. Shivaji decided to have some himself. So he asked them some, and the boys were more than happy to share. They all smoked that shit together and were having a wonderful time.

All the boys were "jhyaap," and talking crap. But, they could notice that there was nothing really wrong with "Shivaji." He looked as normal as he was before he started smoking. The boys were suprised and wondering why gaja and bhang didn't have any effect on "shvaji."

But, anyways, they smoked some more, and talked more crap. Since the boys were so friendly with him, "Shivaji" decided to let out his secret and tell them who he really is.

So Shivaji says, "Guys, do you know who I really am ?? I am Shiva bhagwan and I came down here from Kailash Parbat to see how people were ...."

( You'll love this too!!!)

The boys laugh and reply together, " Ye, balla yeslai lagecha. (oh, now he is "jhyaap")

***************


 
Posted on 08-03-04 2:45 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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nice one mel and relax ;o)....hehe

well made me stressed day a lot better :o)...ok enuf of uni...heading off now...more jokes pls :o)..

laters...:o)
 


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