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 Husband wife - how You manage finances?

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Posted on 05-10-10 9:20 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Just out of curiosity just wondering how you married Nepalese people share finances. Especially
when you are living in USA/Australia ETC.
Are you okay with your wife giving money to her parents and siblings (husbands inlaw)?  In Nepalese culture usually it is not how it works. But wondering how you guys manage it? Especially when both of you are makin money.
how about wifes? Are you okay with husband giving money to his family or your inlaws? Traditionally,
nepali parents family do not take money from daughters. Please share your feeling and thoughts


 
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Posted on 05-10-10 9:49 AM     [Snapshot: 42]     Reply [Subscribe]
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It is personal matter and both of yours family background and culture will play the crucial role and running around it even you are away from home.
How you handle it, it is your way but must have good communication and be open what ever you do. 

 
Posted on 05-10-10 10:42 AM     [Snapshot: 141]     Reply [Subscribe]
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if u love ur family feel responsibily to yr family, your wife could feel same .


If yr wifw is independent then it is better to support her family who raised her ?


you r [Disallowed String for - bad word]ung freely and want to own whole money and body.


 


 
Posted on 05-10-10 10:58 AM     [Snapshot: 177]     Reply [Subscribe]
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If you share bed, share info about finances too. Money does not just make relationships, it breaks too.  There's nothing like you should not give money to in-laws if you both think it is okay, and they want it. My answer will  be the same even after I marry.

 
Posted on 05-10-10 11:37 AM     [Snapshot: 250]     Reply [Subscribe]
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sending money to in laws is not bad but you (both husband and wife) have to manage your own expenses first. in my opinion make a savings plan too and if have surplus and capable of helping your family that is absolutely fine. but if you are just trying to send money to your family being ignorant to your own family (spouse, children) then I think it is bad.

husband and wife should share household expenses if both are employed.

open for critics

 
Posted on 05-10-10 12:15 PM     [Snapshot: 320]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Agree with half_kattu. Sounds like you are smarter than your name jk.
 
Posted on 05-10-10 1:41 PM     [Snapshot: 437]     Reply [Subscribe]
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just wondering how married people manage finances when its only husband and wife and no children.


do you split the rent in half like you'd do with roommates?


open a new account where each person puts in their share and all the bills get paid from that money?


husband takes cares of rent and wife takes of other bills?? or vice versa???


i'd like to know how people are managing finance since this is critical for newly married people and could make or break a relationship.


open to comments and suggestions


 
Posted on 05-10-10 2:20 PM     [Snapshot: 475]     Reply [Subscribe]
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the key is communication and understanding.

husband and wife need to sit together and lay a plan:



if they want to open a joint checking or saving account or retain individual accounts or both.
(there are advantages and disadvantages)

how much are they going to contribute for groceries, rent and anything they both share.

how much is going on saving account and/or IRA and/or emergency fund.

how much is going for individual expenses

there could be more but these are all i can think of

I think if all of these are addressed and both individuals stick by it,  things should go fine.

 
Posted on 05-10-10 2:47 PM     [Snapshot: 516]     Reply [Subscribe]
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guys thanks for the wonderful replies. would be nice if married people shared their experiences...


 
Posted on 05-10-10 2:54 PM     [Snapshot: 508]     Reply [Subscribe]
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no offense to any groups but in our culture women still assume that every expense should be bore by men. even though things are completely different in modern educated societies because unlike our ancestors women do not just stay home and take care of kids and household anymore. They are and must be a part of the workforce. However these cases are still prevalent and I have seen them which is very wrong. Planning is very important. Be careful though!! if you start talking about splitting costs in your new relationship sometimes it might sound very awkward and cheap. sorry but that's how our culture is.

open for critics as always..
Last edited: 10-May-10 02:55 PM

 
Posted on 05-10-10 4:03 PM     [Snapshot: 615]     Reply [Subscribe]
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We have a joint account and we pay everything from that account.


 
Posted on 05-10-10 4:36 PM     [Snapshot: 651]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Jeeeeeeeeeeeeee.....................


When u are married...........I think only one should handle the finance.....whether it is wife or husband. The person who is good at numbers, money and savings should take care of it.


Guys.........Though we live in wetern world, it will take time to adjust to these thoughts of paying separate, and all those craps. When u married everything husband has, is hers and hers is his. There is nothing called I or mine or yours. Its called We.The "WE".


Well.....thats my thinking........I hate when money comes in a wife and husband realtuionship........That doesn't mean one should not be responsible for the finance...........


 
Posted on 05-10-10 5:48 PM     [Snapshot: 716]     Reply [Subscribe]
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I totally agree with stupida. 
 
Posted on 05-10-10 5:56 PM     [Snapshot: 724]     Reply [Subscribe]
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I don;t have personal experience in this matter yet but in my opinion it is ridiculous to split everything in half..if you do so then it is kinda like you are living with a business partner..anyways I think there should be a mutual understanding and if husband pays the rent then  wife should pay other bills like utilities, cell phone etc or vice versa....and both should open a joint saving account and put part of their income in that saving account for the future.


Also, in my opinion it is completely ok to give money to your in laws..I can;t understand why one would even think twice before giving money to their own parents...after all whatever I am today I am because of my parents so I would definately give them money whenever they need it and I would expect my Man to give money to his parents whenever they need it..no questions asked.


 
Posted on 05-10-10 7:24 PM     [Snapshot: 802]     Reply [Subscribe]
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nice ways to do it and a lot of inofrmation so far. thank you all for sharing. i wonder how it'd be for someone who has a spouse that is born and raised in the US while the other one is from Nepal. i am sure upbringing and culture plays a mjor influential role.
 
Posted on 05-11-10 8:05 AM     [Snapshot: 1003]     Reply [Subscribe]
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great thougts
please keep sharing more

 
Posted on 05-11-10 9:58 AM     [Snapshot: 1070]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Posted on 05-11-10 10:43 AM     [Snapshot: 1100]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Now give us your conclusion!
HamroNepal: We guess we shared what we could, Now what is your opinion and how you are taking our views that is what we want to hear from you. हाम्रो मन्त्र सुने पछी कान्छाको मनस्थिती के भयो ?
 

 
Posted on 05-11-10 11:16 AM     [Snapshot: 1140]     Reply [Subscribe]
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Syanjali

these are great   thoughts but after reading it all I am confused in some ways. This is my conclusion

1) Husband and wife should be WE mentality not business partners
2) finance should be open
3) Take care of family first and then spend extra
4) Both should help family because all of have sentiment to family

but I may sound like a jerk but please validate my point. If daughter should help family why dont they get property like sons DO ?In  nepali/Indian culture only sons inherit property. So why would daughter help them?

 
Posted on 05-11-10 11:27 AM     [Snapshot: 1147]     Reply [Subscribe]
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hamronepal...........where were u? all this time..Now in nepal even daughter has rights to her father's property. I know they don't get as much as son do, but daughter is entitled to get from her husband side too. But where does this property issue came from? in this thread. I thought we were talking about finanace between wife and husband.


Sorry...........But I couldn't stop myself from writing .......


I feel sorry for your wife if u are married, and If not, I hope you would change before you get married. BTW, I know a girl in nepal who is looking for a guy to get married. She is the only daughter and her father had put a 4 storied bulding in New Road in her name. Let me know if u r interested?.............


 
Posted on 05-11-10 5:39 PM     [Snapshot: 1280]     Reply [Subscribe]
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well this is my personal opinion so here is what I believe


First of all, I don't believe that daughters should not help their family co'z they don;t get property from their parents...well I will always help my parents financially or in whatever ways co;z I love them, I care for them and whatever I am today it is because of my parents. I do not expect any financial help in return be it a property or whatever....


Just think about it..this is if you are a girl or (if you have a sister)..what if your parents had not invested in you/(or your sister) ..thinking that one day u (or your sister)will get married and u (sister)will get support from your(her) husband and u (sister)will not give any financial support to your parents in their old days ...so why waste time and money on you and rather they  invested in your brother...I know this is still true in most villages in Nepal..and I am completely against this kind of thought or belief...anyways if this was the case then most probably you will still be uneducated ...so arent; you glad that your parents did not discriminate between you(your sister) and your brother  (you) and still invested almost equally on both without expecting anything in return..that is called unconditional love that they have for their children....


so now  it is your turn to payback what they have done for you ...so I don;t understand why would u even think twice before helping your parents in their old days? Will you only help if you get a property in return?


 



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