[Show all top banners]

eclectic
Replies to this thread:

More by eclectic
What people are reading
Subscribers
:: Subscribe
Back to: Stories / Essays / Literature Refresh page to view new replies
 A Story
[VIEWED 4349 TIMES]
SAVE! for ease of future access.
Posted on 05-04-21 2:37 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     0       ?    
 

He stood by the window as the approaching dusk began to spill maroon on the white mountains. The room was small, a typical one-bed hotel room. A laptop sat on the bed with a cursor blinking on a blank page and an empty cup was resting down on the floor. At an age of early fourties some strands of white appeared in between his trimmed beard. His belly protruded a bit stretching the grey t-shirt he wore. The man stood still with a calm face tracing the mountain ridges along its length. In no time, he grabbed his jacket from the hanger by the door and walked out of the hotel room.
The evening air carried chill from the mountains and the city seemed to be prepared already for the imminent winter. Commuters were walking with their warm apparels and the shelves of the clothing stores were full of woolen and thicker varieties. Strolling down to the city centre, clad in his black jacket, the man could not ignore the strong smell of coffee and he soon took a refuge in one of his frequented cafés.
The café was almost occupied with only a few vacant seats available. He walked slowly between the table gaps and took a seat at a corner. A thin looking boy wearing a blue shirt and a yellow cap with a logo of the café approached him and took the order. Talks and coffee aroma filled the space while some laughter and screeching of coffee machine could be heard every now and then. The man looked around and observed the people busy with their talks and musings. There were some familiar faces; the frequent visitors like the man himself. A lady sitting with some people waved at the man as he was scanning his surroundings. He made no mistake recognizing her; they had good talks over coffee table a couple of times before. She parted herself from the group and joined the man.
“Nice to see you” The lady spoke.
The man smiled back and nodded, and at the same time the boy arrived with a mug full of black coffee.
“A cappuccino for me” She said looking at the boy.
“Ah, as usual huh?” The man inquired.
“Yeah, as usual” She replied.
The lady looked younger than the man and a distinct tattoo ran down her neck starting just below her left ear disappearing beneath the brown sweat shirt she wore.
“So, any progress?” She asked looking at the man who was busy stirring sugar in his coffee.
“No. To be honest, not even a single word”
“I think you need to change the place, may be it will help”
“It’s not about place or anything. It’s almost three weeks I am here. It hasn’t worked”
The boy appeared again, this time with a white porcelain cup and placed it gently on the wooden table in front of the lady.
“What does it mean?” The man asked all of a sudden. “Your tattoo” He added.
The lady looked a bit surprised with the course change of the talk.
“It’s Sanskrit”
“And you want me to read it” The man jested.
“I wish you could, but I can translate it for you” She slightly giggled and added, “It says, Freedom”
“FREEDOM” The man repeated the word followed by a sip of coffee and mused for a while.
“Is there something?” The lady asked.
“Yes, perhaps a coincidence, it is freedom that I am lacking” The man said.
“But aren’t you free? I mean, you are writing for your own, no deadlines, no hassles.”
“Yes, but there is something more.”
People kept on coming in and going out and the thin looking boy in his yellow cap moved around taking orders. It was already dark outside and the two decided to leave the café.
A ten-minute walk from the café would lead to the lake, which was popular among the visitors. The lake reflected the red and yellow city lights, and the constant breeze would disturb the water trying to mix the colours. They sat on a bench overlooking the lake and its glittering water. The prevalent serenity definitely contrasted with the bustling café.
“It was never so difficult before, always seemed so easy and simple.” The man said. And after a pause added, “I have written a hundred times before but never felt so empty, so dry; nothing to pour out.”
“Did something happen?” The lady asked.
“May be it did. I now realize that the monk was correct.” He spoke while staring at the ripples on the lake. The lady didn’t interrupt him as he continued, “It’s easy to live in and speak out the usual, the repetitions, but to see beyond that, to create something new is darn difficult.”


TO BE CONTINUED…














 
Posted on 05-05-21 7:49 AM     [Snapshot: 118]     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     0       ?    
 

Building up nicely. Looking forward to part ii
 
Posted on 05-05-21 4:59 PM     [Snapshot: 186]     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     0       ?    
 

Eclectic,
Interesting read! Would like to point out the aspects of your writing that caught my attention.
# the characters have not been named and I like it.
# the imagery you have drawn is quite captivating at places, like the morning scene where the male character is established, the vibes inside the café, the deskription of the lake amidst the lights and breeze trying to 'mix the colors'. The last one was just too good!
# the concluding line spoken by the male character was the icing on the cake, I believe. One can understand in a lot many ways that suit them. It is too hard not to be mundane. Well!

Your plot did remind me of a book that I read last year, a novel called 'Half Girlfriend' by Chetan Bhagat. I have conveniently stopped reading books for a long time now, the only reason I think I picked this book was because I had seen this movie, "Two States" based on the book by Chetan Bhagat and I liked it. In 'Half Girlfriend' a male character goes on to scout around for the girl he wanted to marry after she disappears in some suspicious contexts. This Bihari man here lands in New York and visits every other much visited bars to look out for his girl as she has been an aspiring singer while in India. Little bit too much to digest, maybe that's why the movie made later on did not make that great of the news as such.
Anyway, liked the suspense built up, hoping to read up on how you are going to conclude.
Cheers!
B.

Last edited: 05-May-21 05:14 PM

 


Please Log in! to be able to reply! If you don't have a login, please register here.

YOU CAN ALSO



IN ORDER TO POST!




Within last 365 days
Recommended Popular Threads Controvertial Threads
श्राद्द
TPS Re-registration
सेक्सी कविता - पार्ट २
What are your first memories of when Nepal Television Began?
पाप न साप घोप्टो पारि थाप !!
पुलिसनी संग - आज शनिवार - अन्तिम भाग
निगुरो थाहा छ ??
ChatSansar.com Naya Nepal Chat
Lets play Antakshari...........
What Happened to Dual Citizenship Bill
Basnet or Basnyat ??
Sajha has turned into MAGATs nest
NRN card pros and cons?
is Rato Bangala school cheating?
मेरो अम्रिका यात्रा -२
Do nepalese really need TPS?
कता जादै छ नेपाली समाज ??
susta manasthiti lai ke bhanchan english ma?
कृष्ण नै अन्तिम सत्य
Nas and The Bokas: Coming to a Night Club near you
Nas and The Bokas: Coming to a Night Club near you
राजदरबार हत्या काण्ड बारे....
Mr. Dipak Gyawali-ji Talk is Cheap. US sends $ 200 million to Nepal every year.
Harvard Nepali Students Association Blame Israel for hamas terrorist attacks
TPS Update : Jajarkot earthquake
is Rato Bangala school cheating?
NOTE: The opinions here represent the opinions of the individual posters, and not of Sajha.com. It is not possible for sajha.com to monitor all the postings, since sajha.com merely seeks to provide a cyber location for discussing ideas and concerns related to Nepal and the Nepalis. Please send an email to admin@sajha.com using a valid email address if you want any posting to be considered for deletion. Your request will be handled on a one to one basis. Sajha.com is a service please don't abuse it. - Thanks.

Sajha.com Privacy Policy

Like us in Facebook!

↑ Back to Top
free counters