uff... I like it, it is good. A little, small, something is missing. I hope, that you will figure it out pretty soon. Have fun. And, continue writing. Till next time, Bye. :smiles:

SimpLe_KeTa · Apr 3, 2010 1:44 PM

wht is missin ...why dun u let me know??? thanks for liking though..tc 

unknownanzel · Apr 3, 2010 9:44 PM

Life is good, there is no option TMS

timi_mero_sathi · Apr 3, 2010 9:51 PM

.... unknownanzel Hi! I'm not good at understanding Poems. Specially modern poems. Not to humiliate you, which I don't. There are formulas, and my brain has been framed in those formulas. And your beautiful words were not in that frame. Our human brain has been framed in these past generations. Genes has been like that. Use Formulas like Q/A/Q/A or Q/Q/Q/A or Q/Q/sA/fA etc... I wish your best performances. Be a great writer, my wishes are with you. Bye Click here to subscribe to unknownanzel's postings. You will get notification when the users posts in sajha. Loading...';ajaxpage('subscribeto.cfm?userid=b0a9dfd3-b252-4fc5-8b83-01449278d5a7','subspan3');">

SimpLe_KeTa · Apr 6, 2010 10:53 AM

simple keta what makes you so sure she's trying to write a poem? Sometimes it's good to think outside the box. You need to be a little more open minded.

grgDai · Apr 6, 2010 11:03 AM

... GrgDai Thanks. I will. I've calculated. Rechecked few times. But still I can't... so I guessed, it sounds like a modern Poesy. Started from "had a dream" finished in "i feel everything gonna be alrite someday...sometime.." 1. No, rhymes. 2. 7 sentences. 3. Complex "Past, Future, present". Words used: alrite buy alrite mugs, tshirts and magnets a girl who is not hot, or pretty. Guys just say "shes alrite" so they dont have to say your ugly. Do you like ashley? "shes alrite" by Britney Dec 15, 2003 share this Deeps buy deeps mugs, tshirts and magnets a. meth, dope, shit, shards b. spawning from the metaphore "the deep end", being way into dope, on the slang (sales) 24-7, so deep jail or death is usually the quickest way out. "you got a pipe homey, I got some bomb deeps" drugs dope meth sex mouth hugs by Josh Allen (714 Ca) Jan 19, 2009 share this Sounds like a  Psy. 70's poesy. Have a wonderful time. Bye.

SimpLe_KeTa · Apr 6, 2010 11:23 AM

Simple keta has a point, but its borderlining "dead poet society" . My $0.02. A poem cannnot and should not be judged, unless it is at a poetry contest(such a contest does not make sense nonetheless).

khalisisi · Apr 6, 2010 3:36 PM

... Hi khalisisi Thanks for the words. You wrote, "A poem cannnot and should not be judged, unless it is at a poetry contest (such a contest does not make sense nonetheless). " I'll explain. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Well... I wrote, "I like it, it is good. A little, small, something is missing. I hope, that you will figure it out pretty soon. Have fun. And, continue writing."unknownanzel asked, "wht is missin ...why dun u let me know??? thanks for liking though..tc" ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ grgDai questioned and suggested, "Simple keta what makes you so sure she's trying to write a poem? Sometimes it's good to think outside the box. You need to be a little more open minded."  I answered/explained," Started from "had a dream" | finished in "i feel everything gonna be alrite someday...sometime.." 1. No, rhymes. 2. 7 sentences. 3. Complex "Past, Future, present". ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- khalisisi, those were my answers. And, yes poesy shouldn't be judged. I was not judging but answering. I hope I satisfied your quench. :) Have a wonderful time. Bye. Last edited: 07-Apr-10 02:00 AM

SimpLe_KeTa · Apr 7, 2010 1:58 AM

I know i am not a Poet and i do not think i will be one someday. But, let me tell u , there are free verse points which do not need rhymes. There are 51 types of poetry and all with different forms. That was just  a thought  which was lingering on my mind and i wrote it down. I never thought of writing a perfect poem. Anyway, thanks for ur concern..:)) all the best to u !!

unknownanzel · Apr 7, 2010 9:42 AM

... unknownanzel   Best of luck. :) Keep writing. Anything, your dreams, even your monologue. Have a wonderful time. Bye. Click here to subscribe to unknownanzel's postings. You will get notification when the users posts in sajha. Loading...';ajaxpage('subscribeto.cfm?userid=b0a9dfd3-b252-4fc5-8b83-01449278d5a7','subspan10');">

SimpLe_KeTa · Apr 8, 2010 10:41 AM

All I know is - "TIME" - is the best medicine. For some, it takes more, - for others - less, and, for few, they work different. The best thing I have learned after coming to US is that if u cannot change time, then change yourself - slowely and steadily. I had a dream  too........But mine were I guess very simple........ But, these days ..i'm not falling apart, I am gathering those pieces, and trying to put it together don't kno how far i will be dragging myself - " don't drag urself to a point from where you cannot stand-up again. Just think things could be more worse, and just think about the worst." tears roll down - "Save them; utilize it very catuiously; they are expensive, and means lot to others who knows it's real value." heart breaks - let it break; u grow more stronger everytime it breaks, find ways to fix it, although it's hard. there are plenty. but somewhere deeps inside - yes u r right !!!! i feel everything gonna be alrite someday...sometime.. "When time is right, everything gonna be fine"

STUPIDA · Apr 8, 2010 11:06 AM

Thanks Stupida ..for your soothing words..u r right..time heals..yup the more my heart is  breaking, the tougher i am becoming..so no worries..life is wonderful.. everyday i get a chance to learn new thing..should take every situations positively..i am happy for who i am and i am lucky for what i have got..keep on smiling..tc..

unknownanzel · Apr 11, 2010 11:24 PM