The people I am in love with, they have never heard me saying it or accepting it but they don’t know how many poems and just plain lines I have wrote keeping them in my mind. They don’t know how many times I have pictured them reading my poems and thinking maybe it is them I am talking about. They don’t know how many times I have just allowed myself to get lost to fantasize about them, how many hours I have wasted thinking about them and how much I have yearned to say all the things I think, hope and wish for them out loud. They don’t know and I don’t think I would ever confess. It’s quite a feeling to secretly adore someone, to love someone for every bit of them and sometimes hating them but always, always finding a way to love them back. I guess I am more in love with this feeling than I am in love with these people.

The people I have run out of love for, I don’t think I can ever apologize enough. I don’t know if I even want to. I may be that one girl that burned their hearts but refused to take the warmth or maybe I am that girl they stumbled upon who passed away like a season causing nothing to ponder upon. Whoever I may be, I hope they know I am just someone who crossed their paths and I was never meant to be there for more seasons than I already was. I hope they know it because to know this is a relief. And additionally, I hope they know that whatever they may or I may feel about them today, I will always wish the best for them and that would never change.

The person I thought I run out of love for, I still want you. I still think, talk and dream about you and it hurts. You are still so fresh in my memories and I still blame me for letting you go. I lie awake playing your voices in my head and I keep hitting the repeat button. I keep checking your profile and think about hitting that unfriend button but instead wish that you were still mine. Even now I am thinking what are the odds of you reading this and knowing it’s me and it’s you I am writing for. I still love you but I wish one day I would stop.