Posted by: NayaJivan December 19, 2011
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Vivant,
You live in a naive and idealistic reality. Please don't compare your ideal family with mine. I am guessing your family must be ideal because your prescription does not match the severity of the diagnosis of my family situation.
You know nothing of what my family is like. Four years ago when I went to visit Nepal, I wanted to go to live with my grandparents, sick and tired of the politics in my parents house. Well guess what my parents did? My mother and my father put active pressure on my grandmother to make her tell me, "No you cannot stay in my house. You have to stay in your father's house."
Why did my father do this? Because my mother pressured him to. She told my father, "What will happen to your image and your reputation in society if your son and our buhari go and live in your mother's house? Don't we have respect in this society?"
And in this way, my grandmother, despite her heart ripping, told me that I couldn't stay there in her house. So guess what I did? I had to stay in a cheap hotel in Boudhha just to make my point to my parents that I wasn't going to be bullied by them the way they bully, manipulate and emotionally blackmail everyone else in the family.
Finally, when they realized that they couldn't have their way, and my grandmother was begging to be able to invite me to live to her house, finally, under that kind of pressure, when my father realized that I wasn't going to live in his house, he finally agreed to let me live in his mother's house. My mother and father are still very very bitter that I refused to live in their mansion that the rest of Kathmandu is in complete awe of. My father still brings it up with a lot of bitterness in his voice that his mansion, that the rest of Kathmandu worships as the temple of luxury, was not good enough for me.
You live in a naive and idealistic reality. Please don't compare your ideal family with mine. I am guessing your family must be ideal because your prescription does not match the severity of the diagnosis of my family situation.
You know nothing of what my family is like. Four years ago when I went to visit Nepal, I wanted to go to live with my grandparents, sick and tired of the politics in my parents house. Well guess what my parents did? My mother and my father put active pressure on my grandmother to make her tell me, "No you cannot stay in my house. You have to stay in your father's house."
Why did my father do this? Because my mother pressured him to. She told my father, "What will happen to your image and your reputation in society if your son and our buhari go and live in your mother's house? Don't we have respect in this society?"
And in this way, my grandmother, despite her heart ripping, told me that I couldn't stay there in her house. So guess what I did? I had to stay in a cheap hotel in Boudhha just to make my point to my parents that I wasn't going to be bullied by them the way they bully, manipulate and emotionally blackmail everyone else in the family.
Finally, when they realized that they couldn't have their way, and my grandmother was begging to be able to invite me to live to her house, finally, under that kind of pressure, when my father realized that I wasn't going to live in his house, he finally agreed to let me live in his mother's house. My mother and father are still very very bitter that I refused to live in their mansion that the rest of Kathmandu is in complete awe of. My father still brings it up with a lot of bitterness in his voice that his mansion, that the rest of Kathmandu worships as the temple of luxury, was not good enough for me.