@aap bhi na- I don't think you understand my situation. I love my parents and family as much as you do. And I want to support them as much as you do. I just feel that there is a limit to this and I think my case has already crossed the limit. And I believe justcantgetenough is in the same situation.

I make decent money here and have been sending an average of around $1800 per month to my family for the last two years. I have my wife here and have about 50K in debt. Not to mention, I have lot of health issues and spend quite a bit in health expenses. Haven't been able to pay back my debt here just because i have to send money home. Haven't had a chance to go for vacation ever since I got to this country. Pictures of my friends in facebook going to all these exotic places just makes me jealous. Some of their parents are well off and I understand. But, it just makes me step back and think if I am doing more than necessary to my parents when I see all my Nepalese friends having fun and spending their money like there is no tomorrow, while I sit back and send them all to my parents.

My parents are not educated and I understand that they sacrificed a lot to give me some good education, and I appreciate them doing this for me. However, they have completely stopped working ever since I started my job and expect me to support them for everything. They were around their mid 40s when they stopped working. I don't think this is a time for them to retire. Not that they were making much money even when they were working but I just don't think it is fair for on me for them to retire at this age. I want them to at least make some effort to generate their own income. I have also told them that I would be happy to send them some money to start a business and generate their own income so that I don't have to worry about sending money home all the time. They don't listen...Just keep expecting money from me. I don't want them to completely rely on me for everything .Who knows, anything can happen to me, then what next for them? I  feel even worse when I see some elderly people (around 70s) working at McDonalds. All their life they boast about the American life. Just compare that to my parents who gets to retire at mid 40s and do have to worry about any retirement fund. Now, thats the Nepalese life.

Other thing that bothers me is that my parents expect me to completely support my siblings' education. Don't get me wrong here...I am not saying I do not want to support my siblings education, I would do anything to get them the best education I can. I guess it turned out well for my parents that I being the eldest child, got the best education they can afford and they had no money left for my siblings. Good for them that with that education, I have a good job and I supported for my siblings education. What if the eldest child was a brat and didn't care about younger siblings. Would it be fair to the other siblings? Why is it that in our culture, most parents make no plans whatsoever about their children's future? Americans here start saving for their child's college tuition as early as the child's birth.

One more thing, why just the son? I don't think my sister feels as much obligated to my parents as I do and nor do my parents expect much from her when it comes to supporting them. I helped her with her education, and now when she has a job, she can just go find a guy to marry and not worry about the parents? Why does the burden never go way for me and my sister does not have to deal with it at all? Is it because of the typical mentality of Nepalese parents that only the son gets their wealth? I am all for "Chori lai pani ansha",  as long as the "Chori" does her duties. As much as I support equality here, I would not want my parents to distribute their wealth to my sisters. Not that I want my parents's wealth or that I do not want to share it with my sisters, but i just don't think they deserve it. What they have done to my parents is nowhere compareble to what I have done. 


I am almost 30 now and feel like becuase of all this I have not had a chance to do all the fun things life has to offer. I know I will be having kids in a few years and money is going to be tight then. So, when is my time to have fun in life? All this time, I have been supporting my parents, in a few years add my kids to the list...When is the time for me and my wife?  

Just wanted to share my scenario with everyone and find out what you think about this...I don't know if evil thoughts are growing in my mind but wanted to find out how many of you are going through the same situation and how you are dealing with thi...