For the first time, I did not tell my parents where I was.  When I came home, Gunjan was already asleep. I checked with mom if he was a trouble.  “Your children are always very well behaved.  Both of them are never a trouble.  You guys have done a good job so far”, she assured.  With a cup of black tea, I also went back to bed trying to soak in the feeling of TBi and Mila leaving and my dinner.

Next four days just passed by faster than I could actually imagine, mostly talking to Piyush and his updates.  He had become an architect, learnt that he had been travelling a lot but still single. We were having coffee one day when he coyly uttered, “My parents still talk about you a lot” avoiding our eye contacts. Hours would pass in seconds and at times jokingly he would say, “Sanskriti, I missed out on you!!!”  And, just to end it in a lighter note, we both would laugh.  My craving to stay few more days after 28th seemed to be more appetizing.  The frequency of me having tea with Piyush increased in this one week.  I realized how easy it was to talk in Nepali about the emotions.  I felt nice not to think of translation of some Nepali words, finding it in English and then translate in my head in Spanish.  Suddenly I started finding flaws in what I had thought was my perfect life. 

Just to make my life comfortable, TBi already reconfirmed my ticket to Madrid on 28th August and it was already 26th.

That night when I was trying to put Gunjan to bed, the phone rang.  I picked it up and the voice on the other end said, “Mama…”

I answered,”Hey beautiful, how have you been? Where is your Faa?”

She totally ignored me and requested, “Mama, could you please put Bhai on the phone?  I miss Bhai. Can you come home now?” 

I was startled by my babe’s concern. I hastily put the ear piece in Gunjan’s ear and he with the sweetest accent said, “didi..didi.” 

I tried to say something but Mila was so indulged with Gunjan, calling her “Didi” and she kept saying Bhai!!!!!! I asked her if I could speak to her Father.  She put me through to him.  The chilled emotion ran through me.  I confirmed with TBi that I would be landing on the morning of 29th August.  He, in his usual self assured me things were okay and asked me to take care.  As I hung up the phone, I sprang out of bed and started my packing.

Throughout the packing of one suit case to another I asked myself, why did I ask for one more week?  Was it only to forget who I crafted myself as?  Was I tired of my mundane life, as most of my cousin and friends reckon or was I just being adventurous?  Was my childhood fling (yes I admit) was so strong that I wanted to know more beside those marvellously sparkling eyes, beside those childhood mockery and mischief?  Why was I so keen to know Piyush now?  What excuse do I have to put my three of the babes aside and walk with him for some miles?  Was I trying to tell myself how vulnerable I was?  Whatever it was, I made up my mind.

She totally ignored me and requested, “Mama, could you please put Bhai on the phone?  I miss Bhai. Can you come home now?” 

I was startled by my babe’s concern. I hastily put the ear piece in Gunjan’s ear and he with the sweetest accent said, “didi..didi.” 

I tried to say something but Mila was so indulged with Gunjan, calling her “Didi” and she kept saying Bhai!!!!!! I asked her if I could speak to her Father.  She put me through to him.  The chilled emotion ran through me.  I confirmed with TBi that I would be landing on the morning of 29th August.  He, in his usual self assured me things were okay and asked me to take care.  As I hung up the phone, I sprang out of bed and started my packing.

Throughout the packing of one suit case to another I asked myself, why did I ask for one more week?  Was it only to forget who I crafted myself as?  Was I tired of my mundane life, as most of my cousin and friends reckon or was I just being adventurous?  Was my childhood fling (yes I admit) was so strong that I wanted to know more beside those marvellously sparkling eyes, beside those childhood mockery and mischief?  Why was I so keen to know Piyush now?  What excuse do I have to put my three of the babes aside and walk with him for some miles?  Was I trying to tell myself how vulnerable I was?  Whatever it was, I made up my mind.

For the last time, I scheduled to meet Piyush.  This time I got my driver to drive me to his work.  I entered Annapurna Arcade then walked through the long hallway, which felt like the longest walk of my life.  Entered into a room lavishly decorated, flat screen hung in the walls of the office, Gold stroke - Thanka Painting on the other on a pure white background.  It was hard for me to tell if that office was really in Kathmandu with very neatly stacked books, the spread out designs of the new town plans and miniature models of different metropolitan cities around the globe.  He excitedly showed me around.  Half hour seemed almost a day standing in that office.  At the end, I summoned my courage, “Excuse me. I have to get out of here.”  He stood up and held his jacket and said, “Let’s go then.” We walked to the door, I uttered, “Piyush, thank you for being a friend.  It’s me who needs to get out of here, not you.”  He looked at me, confused, concerned but yet a considerate friend.  I left him in the lobby and walked out, my head held up half high.  Thousand times I thought I will look back but then kept walking straight out of the hallway to the corridors and in no time I was in middle of Durbarmarg. 

On 28th at 1230 hrs, I was to catch the flight.  I kept looking at the phone if there were any missed calls but there were none. I held Gunjan on one arm and bid a farewell to my Granny who had tears every time I spoke to her for past 3 days. She uttered, “Tan arko pali aaunda ma hunchu ya hunna.  Ramrari talai herna de (I am not sure if I will be around when you visit next time. So, let me look at you as much).”  I shushed her “aama, ma jahile aaunda pani hajur hunu huncha.  Nachahini kura nagari na (you will be around every time I come home. Stop the nuisance).” she held Gunjan in her arms, kissed him in his forehead and slid Rs. 100 note on his forehead.  Mom did the same and so did my cousins. Finally, I bowed down to my granny, hiding my tears as I said “gayera aaunchu hai, aama, (I will be back soon).”  She smiled and waved her tiny wrinkled hands but still longing to see me in next time.  Then, we all headed to Tribhuvan International airport. 

With a few hours stopover in Bangkok, my flight arrived in Madrid 730 next morning. No sooner did I pass the immigration, my eyes searched for some familiar faces, in a distant I spotted TBi holding Mila’s hand.  He took huge steps towards me.  He seemed to forget that Mila was holding his finger.  I still had Gunjan in my arms.  TBi came and wrapped me around.  His hug came as a warm Cashmere blanket around me.  Most comfortable hug I could ever recall as if that one wrap was trying to say: you belong to me. 

We withdrew ourselves from the hug and he whispered, “Sanskriti, Did you have a good time?” His impeccable pronunciation of my name made me fall for him one more time.

I looked up into his deep blue eyes and uttered “No, babe I missed you.” 

Four of us slowly walked out of Barajas airport into our world. This is where I call my home.

******* The end ********

3 September 2010

Madrid

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