Good job indeed!!! I could so relate it to my childhood experiences. Esp. the part where you talked about you two being distant after you came back to Rampur. Changing roles and sticking to the norms of the  society. Identifying oneself as a "boy" or as a "girl" in terms of what we should be doing.
The structure and the flow of the story is awesome.
You may not be a "writer", but you are definitely a writer, if you know what I mean.
Peace.