gahugoro ji, I've written these things from my own experiences coz I belong to the same community. What I meant by 'arranged marriage' was that you can't think of marriage within a Newar community as an 'arranged marriage' of a gurung with another gurung or a bahun with another bahun. Newar community has many castes and communities within itself, they are arranged on a hierarchical basis and you can't think of 'arranged marriage' of one Newar with another Newar in similar light. Well you may have seen a 'hindu' newar marrying a 'buddhist' newar or a Joshi marrying a Manandhar / or Bajracharya. But I have also seen a 'bahun' marrying a 'Damai' and a 'Chhetri' marrying a 'Tamang'. Exceptions are everywhere, but that is not the usual norm right? So you may have seen the exceptions but they are by no means the norm among the majority, even in the core areas of the Capital city. Being aware of hindu customs is one thing, but these things are not considered in practical life. A 'bajracharya (the buddhist guru)' marries either a bajracharya or a shakya or a dhakhwa, no one else is allowed. You can conduct a survey in the Thamel area regarding this matter, the so called tourist hub of Kathmandu or in New Road, and you will be surprised to know the resuls. Language can be one common point, but the other aspects of Newar culture are so diverse and the beliefs are so deeply held that it will take some more centuries to find more common grounds for Newar unity. To put it simply, its like the "maithili' community, everyone there may be bound by the 'maithili' language, but you can't find grounds for unity between a Jha / Mishra or a Chamaar / Dom, just on the basis of linguistics. Right ? And my statements about pode / chame etc holds true in almost every household. I am yet to find a Newar house where it doesn't hold true.