Why are you even bothered to ask this question? You already know the answer why this happens...unless you are just looking to validate what your own reasoning. They 'shop around'..date girls and if they wanted to settle down with someone they dated, they would have done so. They finally figured out that the girls he dated didn't fit his idea of 'wife'...so end of going home and marrying complete strangers. I think at that time, they have given up on dating and just want to settle down, but dont have to the energy or enthusiasm to pick a girl themselves. And it looks good on the books if he goes home and marry the girl his family picked. I think even you agree that not everyone does that..and if he is really in love with some girl, he will do his best to marry her..no matter where they met and live. Some simply get married in Nepal to the girl his parents pick because he didnt have any girlfriend.