Sitara, Religion is a personal matter. I agree with that 100% and thats why you dont what religious group I represent. What is not a personal matter is with that one sentence of PM Koirala changed the way we look at ourselves. We are no longer the citizens of the only hindu country. We have differed in the ways we raise our kids. I have a six year old. I want him to realize the importance of our festivities. I want him to be able to relate and rejoice the culture that I lived through. I am going to miss that. I lost a sense of belonging with that statement. I lost a part of my roots. You might argue that we might still be able to practise that. I will retaliate with if thats the case why call it a secular state? Something will change and I dont want people touching things that doesnt affect the normal citizens. Prachanda probably stroked his ego, but a kami is still a kami in Nepal today. To put it in your perspective, there will still be global warming. Like global warming is a culture in the new world, the stamp of a hindu nation and all the "conservative ideologies" that come with it is the culture of my roots. I am not ready to let go of my roots just cuz there are problems in the new world. Global warming might bring you a problem that will kill us from outside in, lack of culture and custom will kill a person from inside out. I have taken my pick. Another thing that is not a personal matter is when the previous government declared demonstrations illegal there were riots that broke out and when this government does the same, its all fair in the name of democracy. Wheres the democratic practise in deciding something this important to the nation. Have we all lost our marbles? These are the same people who we accused of selling our rivers for their personal interest. I guess, we as a country have a very short term memory. Its a shame but thats our tribute to our nation. About your last question, I am getting by Sitara. Like I said, I have a six year old. I wanted to tell him about my country and my culture. I wanted to see him grow old questioning the traditional norms we used to follow. I wanted to see him challenge those beliefs for his. I guess I will be missing out on that part of my life. But what I still do with him is that I tell him the history of my country as I learned it. I tell him the great dynasties that ruled the land; from the good old shepards to the shahs. I will tell him about the unification. I will tell him about how newars who lost the battle that day and yet they won the war. Not to divert from my "to do" list, but I bet you that more than half the leaders that sit in the parliamentary hall in kathmandu today don't even know the year the malla king lost kathmandu to the prithvi narayan shah. My son will know that day, and yes monarchy seems to fade in Nepal but its still shinning high in my heart. Its my job to let it shine high in the hearts of my kid. Thats one thing I will not fail at. And thats how I am getting by.