. You can enjoy a beer all night long. 2. Beer stains wash out. 3. You don't have to wine and dine beer. 4. When your beer goes flat, you toss it out. 5. A beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer. 6. Hangovers go away. 7. When you go to a bar, you can always pick up a beer. 8. Beer never has a headache. 9. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents. 10. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer. 11. If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head. 12. You can have more than one beer in a night and not feel guilty. 13. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer. 14. Beer is always wet. 15. You can have a beer in public. 16. A beer doesn't care when you come. 17. A beer is always satisfying. 18. A beer gets lighter the longer you hold it. 19. No matter what the package, a beer still looks good. 20. Its okay to leave a party with a different beer than the one you brought.