I go out of town (and away from Sajha) for a few days and what a lot did I miss! This is a great thread and I can't help but put in my two cents so here I go ... First off, I am going to try hard not be judgmental about anyone and brush everyone with one stroke. I do, however, want to share my own experience with Nepalese and foreign women and my feelings about both types of relationships. I guess I, like some other people, have had a natural tendency to gravitate towards women who share my ideas and interests. The fact that they were Nepalese may have contributed to the process because there is a sense of shared experience that comes when you meet someone from your culture and that helps start and cement a friendship. With foreign women, I have only had short relationships and none of them have been of a "serious" nature. I am not sure I can fully explain why. I guess the cultural divide was simply too huge in most of these cases inspite of my women partners and me being open minded about such differences. I feel my relationship with women is somehow tied to my relationship with myself. I was brought up in what I now realize was a fairly liberal household and exposed to certain kinds of values that have made me into a complex person with a somewhat strong sense of identity. There is a socially and politically progressive aspect to my identity but I also feel a sense of belonging to my roots and pride of my culture and country (in spite of all its shortcomings). Maybe it is this that makes it difficult for me to have relationships with foreign women because there is too much I have to let go off to sustain the relationship. I do not want to compromise to a point where I would be unhappy or loose my identity. Does that then mean that I have perfect chemistry with Nepalese women? Of course not. I have realized there is no such thing as a Nepali women or a Nepali man in my mind. There is too much diversity within the Nepalese community for there to be a typical or atypical Nepali girl or guy. My last relationship was with a Nepali girl and it broke down because my partner and I could not make the kind of compromises that were necessary to have a lasting relationship. We were from pretty different cultural backgrounds within Nepal but shared two common languages and many common interests too. But it wasn't culture that the relationship ruptured on. We were beyond that (and thats probably the only thing she and I still agree on.. he he) . It was personality. We matured into two different people even though we seemed to have a lot in common when we started. One of my many conclusions from my own experience is that it's ultimately about personality, at least for me. Culture, nationality, race, ethnicity certain fuel attraction or conflict but in the end it is who you are in your mind and what you seek to gain or loose from a relationship that decides who you fall in love with or who you break-up with. Enough said - sorry if I over-analyzed the topic :)