I think I like the composition of the second one better but are you actually hoping to get feedback on singing or the song composition? Here is a piece I am writing for someone.
I was hoping to get a feedback on the composition I know my voice isn't that good thanks for the feedback. You have a nice voice though!! needs some instruments
You guys are pretty good at it. There is a specialty group somewhere around us, I heard that showcases talents like you guys' and lets everyone else appreciate it. That way, you can even keep on practicing your skills and groom it and at the same time make some really good listeners too.