I was once asked by a college friend, here's the scenerio:

If the boat carrying you, your parents and your son sinks, who do you save first?

By our upbringing, of course parents. It is the right thing to do, we all know it. But think logically, if there was a logical explantion and NOT "emotional" attachment (no emotional feelings at all), it is worth saving your old parent over your younger son? Isn't it a symbolic of saving PAST(parents) over FUTURE(son)? I was shocked when he asked me this and the explanation of how how some social reasoning reflect where they're now. Some culture in a different way prefers to save the son. There's NO right and wrong here. Does Our RIGHT makes us better than them. What am trying to say is our society has too much of emotional interpretation of your realtionship withing our family, not saying other cultures do not, it's just we take it too far and it reflects where we are now. We're taught to obey and listen your elders, never allowed to question. Is it healthy? Our country is ruled by old folks and never by younger leaders (old people thinking younger generation not mature or even worth enough to lead). We live with our PAST, obey it and carry it along with you into FUTURE. Is that working?

Conflicting with your parents does not make you a bad son/daughter. Period. I think, infact, you're a better person if you question them with issues realted to the welfare of mankind, not just obey them like a person with no conscious.

I know all of u r going parents first scenario here but here is a thing

i love my parents, respect them, we are our parents flesh and blood. they will never want to hurt usi n anyway, ur simle brings them joy, there will be always conflicts but we need to approach them in the right way.

This is not just coming out of me but my dad himself, this is the reason why i am very close to my parents. Just talk to your parents about your situation, and how you feel about it and acknowledge that you know how they feell about your situation and justify ur solutions in a right way, do not justify by pointing fingers at who is wrong and right. I am sure you and ur parents will come to a final solution that will make you guys happy.

Good LUCK!

Not everybody is lucky like you having parents who listen to you. Majority of Nepali parents are very forceful and "my way or the hight way" to their kids. We need to listen to their side of story how they handle situations when their parents doesn't listen to them at all.

Let me tell you my side of story.....

My ex-galfriend was Gurung and i am Bahun.....My mother opposed the relationship......But i was rude enough to oppose her.....but now since My gal-friend married another guy (so called her own caste) i am in the miidle of nowhere........So please guys don't be stupid like me.....Coz Parents knows lot of things we don't know......be OBEDIENT!!!

I am  one of thsoe luckiest person, who can share all my joys and sorrows with my parents, Specially with my fater. Buwa, thank you for always being there for me.

"most if not all problems. If you make good money and can support your parents everyone will respect you in Nepal. Even your parents will do what you tell them to do and not the other way around, provided that you are a reasonable personmost if not all problems. If you make good money and can support your parents everyone will respect you in Nepal. Even your parents will do what you tell them to do and not the other way around, provided that you are a reasonable person."

In my case this is not true..don't know about others.

Money is not the solution for the conflict between parents and children.  Parents always think of us so we should listen to them and respect their words but if we feel thats wrong we can give our suggestions not money. Atleast today's parent will rethink of the suggestion we give. They won't do the things forcibly. They too know that time is changing . They might not think like the way we do but they think for our best.  So i respect their decision. And Guys Money is not the soln and will never be the soln. It's just what i think and might not match to others view.

There is no doubt among us that our parents have done a great deal for us and we should and we do (at least majority of us) respect and love them. However, when we grow and become mature and especially when we get educated here and live here in the US or other developed countries, our ideas and thoughts might conflict with that of our parents. When they were of our age, they might have had the same situation with their parents and might have thought the same way. And the main thing is that our parents won't change now for our ideas or for us. So, I think we should understand them and even though we disagree with them and might have better and geniune reasons to back our ideas and points, we should confront them in a nice way, with all due respect and love, and in a polite way.

Of course, there are small and little disputes in all homes, especially if you live with your parents, either here in the US, other countries, or in Nepal, and you might flatly disapprove of their ideas, but that does not mean that you don't love them or respect them. These small things don't matter, I believe, in a family unless we let it grow and grow. The main thing for me is, even though I don;t agree with them for their small and tiny things, I do love and respect them and I will surely not hurt them for real or big decisions in life.

I DO NOT understand how agreeing with them on everything just beacuse they're old constitutes RESPECT.  Don't you think it should be the other way around? It is called "Bollywhood" symdrome, too much irrational emotion, less reality. Just beacuse they're old would you NOT held them responsible if they commit a crime, or you just let them go beacause they have grey hairs? Aren't we ruled and exploited by people with grey hairs everyday from politicians to goverment workers.

I think "money" is a key factor and I agree with all of you, but how about if they're too greedy? The neighbour has aquired 5 land and 3 more houses and you're told that we'll have to catch up with them. Even after all the finiancial support you've given to them, they now expects you to land on the moon since some guys did it. They would not quit, nudge nor listen to you when you try to calm them down, instead you get yelled at everytime you call home these days. That's my case. How do I keep up with their never ending impossible demands, I'm running low and dry?