Having guests over - Sajha Mobile
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Having guests over
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nepalihost
· Snapshot 0
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If there is one thing I don't envy for Nepalis living in the US is the number of guests they have to host every year. Guests expect the hosts to leave everything in their day to day lives to cater to their every need starting from the time they step out of the airport.

If the guest is coming directly from Nepal then the expectation is increased exponentially starting from sharing their every whim to finding them a job. They assume you don't have a life and can drop everything you are doing to invite them into your personal sanctum. Most of the time you have never met them before or even heard of them. They know your uncle or they are your fathers friends relatives.

If the same thing happened the other way around. Let's say you are visiting Kathmandu and ask someone if you can stay at their house for a few days then I am not sure if you would get the same welcome.
halo
· Snapshot 82
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Can totally relate.
sajhaguy69
· Snapshot 114
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 I'm sure most people whom you helped would welcome you if you call them when you go to Nepal. 
Most Nepali family wouldn't feel comfortable having male non-family member in their house staying if they have daughters of age in the house. It's how the culture is, Nepal is a closed society. However, people whom you help would help you if you just call them (most would).
itsbapres
· Snapshot 243
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Nepalihost, Couldn't agree more with you. That's why these days I try to act a little smarter but I am the most dumb person when it comes to such issues. Among many instance the worst one was where I helped my own relative (distant dewar) for around 2 weeks and his sali for about a month and half. I had school too but wasn't working so had plenty of time. He was in LA actually and said he didn't had the credit card to buy the ticket to SFO. My husband sponsored the ticket and when they were here I tried each and every way to make her and him feel like their own home. I was literally Nepal ma kaam garnae manche jastai (looking back, but at that time I though I was helping them). After that I visited Nepal for a months. The guy I helped always pretended to act like he and his family were super busy and all and the worst part is our home is like 1 min apart. Again, he had to come to US and he would inform me like a mth earlier that he was coming and he would send us the detail once everything was finalized. I really wanted to say I din't wanted to host him this time but, I didn't wanted to ruin the reputation of my family back home and unwillingly I did it again. I visited Nepal again for 3 mth, 5 mth earlier and again they didn't even come to visit me. I personally feel we ppl living here in US are much more helping and especially if its relatives we try every possible way to help them. But, when we are back home, same ppl don't even have few min for us. :( :(
sherlock
· Snapshot 298
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Glad I don't need have anything to relate to this. Wish I could say the same about my extended family back home. 


mno
· Snapshot 439
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My near and dear ones did not get any DV yet. I am glad. :)   I am just happy that I got to show my parents USA.
Whenever I go back, I always tell the reality to people back home so whoever comes here they are prepared for their struggle.
Last edited: 26-Nov-12 10:43 AM
magorkhe1
· Snapshot 540
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मेरो कजन IEEE को बार्सिकी मिटिंग मा आएको त्यो पनि भारतको प्रतिष्ठित बिस्वबिध्यालय बाट MS गरेको , मैले F1 दिने मान्छे झैँ गर्यो | अबैध्य बस्छु भन्थ्यो - नबस्ने सल्लाह दिए अनि १५०० माईल टाढा भएकोले बोलाइन , त्यो दिन देखि हाम्रो बोलचाल छैन , हाल क्यानाडा बात डाकतरी पदवी झुन्द्याए रे ? खुसि लाग्छ सुन्दा | मुलाकुरा : (मास्टर डिग्री लिनेको र बिस्वबिध्यालय मा पधाऊनेको यो मनस्थिति अरुको कुरै छोडौ )अनि तेस्माथि कुर्सीमा बसेर काम गरेकालाइ काम खोजि दिन पनि गारो हुन्छ, ए मलाइ त्यो ग्यास मा काम गर भन्ने ( त्यो त तुच्छ काम भयो नेपालमा came with the same mentality takes time to understand) !
laptop
· Snapshot 724
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I helped few Nepalese Families back in 2008-2009. Now, they don't even recognize me. I used to drop them to school, used to take them hospital, grocery store. i even took a day off if they needed help. Its all good. probably they will regret in future. atleast I hope so.
magorkhe1
· Snapshot 741
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ल्याप्तोप ब्रो : गुड कर्मा 
धर्म गर फलको आसा नगर सुन्नु भा थियो हैन |

abc999
· Snapshot 874
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you guys have to help with saccha man, u have to think of geeta

fal ko assh nagara, what you guys need in return for helping others
laptop
· Snapshot 1148
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abc999 and magorkhel ब्रो.... मैले आस गरेको होइन नि. तेही पनि उ बेला मा सहयोग गरेको मान्छे भनेर हुन्छ नि अलि अलि hi , हेल्लो त यार.....मान्छे नै नचिने . वास्ता नै नगर्ने. यो त अलि भएन नि.. होइन र ?
Khumbule
· Snapshot 1194
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Have the same bitter experience, I even helped two persons find the lawyers to file their asylum. They are granted and now, they don,t even know who I am. The problem is selfishness.
Relax_Singh
· Snapshot 1376
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Well, you have to look at it this way. When u first came to US, someone u knew or ur friends knew or ur parents knew in the US probably helped u to get started and become comfortable in ur place. (or may b, u struggled by urself). OR, if ur brother or sister or cousin went to Australia, Canada or any other country, you would want someone you know who is in that same location to help out ur relative. So its only human for others to want to do the same.  Over these several years, I have been on both sides of the field. When I was new to US, people I knew or my family knew helped me get started. Then, when I had settled here, other people expected me to help them when someone new came to US. Thats just the circle of life for international students in the US. Now, I have lost contact with the dais and didis who helped me initially, but that doesn't mean I have forgotten them. Whenever they need anything from me, I will always be there to help them. I have also lost contact with people who I have helped to get started. But it doesn't mean all people are selfish. Its just the way of life. People get busy with things, and lose contacts over time. It all depends on people's personalities.
nepalihost
· Snapshot 1401
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It was good to know everyone's point of view. One thing that's interesting is generally people with families don't invite people to live with them in their house in Kathmandu, but they will expect Nepalis living in the US to invite them to live in their house with their families.
nepaligal81
· Snapshot 1441
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Woudln't you want someone to help you? At the end of the day, treat others as you would wanted to be treated... BUT... those people who want help have to be worth it. It depends on how they are. Are they grateful? Are they decent people?

You have to take a lot of things into consideration.... If someone from Nepal came who was an ass... I wouldnt give them all my time.
magorkhe1
· Snapshot 1441
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सहयोग भनेको बिरालालाई दुध पैचो दिएको जस्तै हो | हरेक व्यक्ति आफ्नै मानसिकता बोकेको हुन्छ | बाहिर जे भए पनि ठाउमा कुरा गर्नु पर्यो भने र तपाइँ अगाडी हुनु हुन्छ भने तेस्को बोल्ती बन्द हुन्छ अनि ठुला तुला कुरा हाक्न सक्दैन | अनि दिमागको एक कुनामा तपाइले गरेको शहयोग को आभास दैनिक पाई रहेकै हुन्छ भलै अहिले तपाइँ संग टाढिएर बसे पनि, त्यो मेरो कजन को दिमागमा " यो दाइले अबैध नबस नभनेको भए मा कहा पी. एच. डी. झुन्द्याऊन पाऊथे भनि मनको एक कुनामा मेरै जय होस् बनि गुणगान गरि बसेको हुनै पर्छ "अनि यही बिस्वास मा बस्नुस र बिचराको कुरै नगर्नुस |
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